Don't leave just yet. Besides these articles, sometimes I send out extra special stuff. Don't miss out. Sign up here.
people are love and respecting (now).
Join the movement.
Almost every single time I have signed off on an Ask Joy email or post, I’ve ended it with the words, “From My Heart.” The reason I use these words is because they’re true.
I care deeply for my generation and how we do marriage, dating and singleness. Through all the questions and topics we’ve discussed together, my hope is that you now feel a bit more equipped to understand yourself and others, and feel confident using the Love and Respect principles. I also hope you’ve caught glimpses of God and His love for you.
And, finally, I hope you’ve laughed. Because, why not?
I have had some thoughts stirring in my brain for some time now, so I’d like to bring you another video that will do all of the above once again. I hope you’ll grab some popcorn, have a chat with me and truly hear what’s going on in my heart.
(At the end of the video, you can hear about some of my self-diagnosed, psychological problems.)
From my heart,
P.S. Want to know more about The Illumination Project? Find out HERE.
DID YOU LIKE THIS POST?
CHECK OUT ALLLLL OF THE LOVE AND RESPECT NOW POSTS HERE.
(Yeah, all of them.)
Don't leave just yet. Besides these articles, sometimes I send out extra special stuff. Don't miss out. Sign up here.
Love and Respect (Now) is a division of Love and Respect. Please be considerate.
I’m selfishly sad that I just found you as a resource and yet I’m thiled that you’re following what’s written on your heart. Praying that your path is illuminated. (See what I did there?)
Thank you Melissa! Such kind and encouraging words. I welcome the prayers. And don’t fear — there will be new content released over the next year you can find on loveandrespect.com as well as all the past posts that will hopefully take you at least 20 minutes to read through. (-;
Thank you so much for sharing your heart again in this video. You have helped me formulate my worldview in relationships in countless ways. I can’t even tell you how many times God has used your blog to convict, direct, or shape my heart. Thank you for being a source of wisdom to me as I have stepped into the world of dating.
I’m sure my boyfriend would thank you, too. I have learned from you how to cherish him in ways he can appreciate. I learned from you to even be brave enough to date, period. You have touched my heart, mind, and soul and taught me how to be brave, wise, and inquisitive. Your influence on me has even spilled out on others.
Thank you for sharing your heart and insight so I don’t have to say “if I only knew then what I know now” someday. And thanks for giving me the travel bug to visit Portland! 🙂
If you’re ever in Phoenix, dibs on buying your coffee!
Wow Lindesy — Your words overwhelm me. Truly. Thank you for sharing all of this and I am humbled that my silliness, heartache and prayers for the Lord to allow me to help others really has made an impact. I pray the Lord brings people into your life who you can continue to influence as well. Thanks again!
That’s easy – just smile to right! 🙂 Like below, but without the extra space between the eyes and mouth.
If you want to get technical, it’s a colon followed a right parenthesis. Also, WordPress is evidently no respecter of noses on smiley faces. Now that the mystery has been solved, you’ll have to find something else to do on your sabbatical. Maybe something like, I don’t know, maybe praying and reading God’s Word, but that’s your decision.
Your Brother in Christ,
I agree with Val.
Happy yet sad.
I look forward to seeing the messages being “redistributed.”
Enjoy the field as it is being nourished.
Oh my goodness I feel like I’m saying goodbye to a friend. I could get sappy on this, just ask my friends. I tend to be sappy. But I do want to say I have learned so much through your writings and videos. You’ve taught me to ask questions, to seek community, and to take risks. I know this sabbatical is going to be a great time for you. I’ve been feeling the need for more own sabbatical. I’m working on finding a time to do that. There’s something that I need to stop and rest from doing. (On to figuring out what that is) Best wishes to you on your sabbatical. I definitely won’t be a stranger around here.
Oh and you are the FIRST person I have ever “met” who also has a thing for sounds. I could not stop laughing and saying “yes! yes! yes!”, especially the plastic covers on the books- still my favorites!! My mom always made fun of me because I have to move the cover back and forth as I read. I couldn’t stand not too. That’s one reason I loved reading so much! Talk about relaxing!!!
Thanks again! Hoping this is not the END!!!
Ahhahah! You aren’t alone. There are thousands of us!!!
Also thank you for your kind words. Please don’t stop visiting facebook, twitter and insta because I have created ways for the conversations to continue. I need people like you to keep the discussions going amongst our generation. I NEED YOU JENNIFER!! (-: No pressure. But maybe a little bit.
I have so enjoyed your videos and totally binged watched them last summer when I first found your site! I appreciate your insight and your laugh is one of the best I’ve heard! If you decide to not come back I wish you the best…but if you do come back, well that would be just fantastic!
PS bundles of joy sounds good to me 🙂
Ahh Kelsi! Read what I just wrote to Jacinta before seeing this. I will count you as the final vote for Bundles of Joy.
And thank you for your kind words. I love that you binged watched them. That little opening tune is by my friend Ragnar if you want to hear more than just the first ten seconds of his music. http://www.ragnarmusic.com/home.php
Wow. I am going to miss these new posts twice a week, but I definitely understand the need for rest. The last couple years have been that sort of a season for me, as well, and I can only hope that yours will be an incredible time of rest and renewal for you. I’ll be praying with you for what lies ahead. Good things for you, I’m sure! Rest well!
Thank you Julie!! You have been a faithful reader and friend from the beginning. I so appreciate your encouragement along the way and do believe you when you say you’ll be praying for me. For that, I can’t thank you enough! I would love if you helped keep the conversations going this next year as we try to keep new readers engaged and ultimately get the Love and Respect message to our generation, now! xo
I’m in. Whatever it takes!
Well, I’ve only been watching your videos for a few months and I’m incredibly thankful that I found them. Although I’m super sad that you won’t be making new ones, I’m also super happy that you’re taking a sabbatical.
I can’t tell you how much your videos have meant to me and how helpful it has been for someone to finally start the conversation on dating, love, marriage etc. in the church. Dating in our 30’s sucks. It really does.
My favorite part of your videos is how funny they are. I love how you just completely put yourself out there and you’re so fun. I laugh so much when I watch them, and for that, I’m also grateful. I’m glad we’re facebook friends and look forward to staying in touch with you, Joy. I’ll be praying for you during your sabbatical…and praying you sneak some new videos in (I’m terrible). LOL!
Anywho, thanks so much for everything, you’re the best!!! Blessings to you, and Merry Christmas, Majestic Unicorn Joy!!!
Joy, thank you so much for sharing your heart and wisdom through L&R Now. It has been such an encouragement to me and more than once I have shared your videos or columns with others in my circle or those I have gotten in conversations with because I thought something you said was particularly fitting and helpful for that situation.
I pray that your sabbatical season is a time of discovery and a blessing for you. I too am just walking into a rest and discovery season that has been much needed. I’m excited to see what God has in mind for both of us. Blessings to you on your journey.
Thank you Rachel — it’s so encouraging to hear that you have shared the content and it’s gotten conversation started in your community. That has been my heart (and why I created The Illumination Project and partly why I’m assessing what may or may not be next) because I want the discussions to move beyond a computer screen and into the lives of people who know and love each other in person. Keep it up!
Praying for you, Joy!!
Joy! I so honor you for making this decision! I will especially miss your Monday Morning updates but trust that your Mondays will now be spent doing more restful things. Really impressed and thankful for your thoughfulness and strength in continuing to model healthy living for us. You’re awesome! Praying blessings for you and this season.
Joy, after hearing you on the Relevant podcast, I have loved reading and watching your videos. I share them all the time!! Your videos with other peoples’ stories have been so encouraging and challenging that God works in such creative ways in our lives. I also appreciate your honesty and wisdom! I pray your sabbatical cultivates great things. Looking forward to seeing what God does in your life!
Joy, thank you for all of the posts over the last 5 years! I’ve probably been following for the past two, maybe even three and I love your posts. You are hilarious, and yet so wise and relevant! I’ve often passed along this website to other youth leaders who want to gather resources, particularly for teenage/young adult girls. I’ll continue to do so – as there is so much goodness! I can’t wait to see older ones being promoted that perhaps I missed as well!
Thanks so much Kendall! That you would share with others means so much. If you work with youth, I’m super pumped for you to see the small group bundles we are releasing starting in January and if you haven’t checked out The Illumination Project — I hope you will! It’s available for streaming now which might make it easier for larger groups. Thanks for being a leader and keeping the conversations going. http://loveandrespect.com/store/the-illumination-project-online-streaming.html
Alex here. I first discovered your site about a year ago (when one of your videos was linked by my other favorite Christian relationship blog, http://www.preengaged.com) and have been hooked ever since! I have appreciated your quirky and balanced perspective and willingness to tackle the more difficult issues. Your three-part series on “Is there just one?” and the discussion that followed was particularly helpful as I arrived at my own conclusions on the matter. Your encouragement to seek the counsel of those who know us well (especially those older and wiser than we are) is much needed. In this way, I consider you to be a godly older sister – a sister in Christ, who is not afraid to tell it like it is.
There is also great wisdom in taking a rest from your labors – may God bless your ministry in this time of sabbatical. It is when things start accelerating that such rest is most needed. Here some thoughts to encourage you in this time:
–> As one preacher put it, “you can come apart every once in a while, or you can just plain come apart.” 🙂
–>Psalm 127:2 says “It is vain for you to rise up early, To sit up late, To eat the bread of sorrows; For so He gives His beloved sleep.” Take the rest you need.
–> Renowned preacher/theologian A.W. Tozer was known to, once a week, book a private coach on a train for a four to eight hour round trip and spend the whole time in prayer.
–> I have been a part of Willow Creek Community Church (maybe you’ve heard of it?) since I moved to Chicago this last summer: our senior pastor Bill Hybels now, once a year, spends one week in solitude on the cabin of a cruise ship – not to enjoy the amenities, but to seek God concerning our church and his role as its leader. He shared in a sermon that, in the first few years after starting Willow Creek, he was trying to do everything (leader, teacher, counselor, etc.) and totally hit the wall. Members of the church stepped up to take on his responsibilities during what was evidently a slow and painful recovery. In time, he returned to a more sane and normal pace, but not without setting aside the time for a one-week “sabbatical” every year.
Thanks again for really sharing from the heart, as you have done in all of the videos I’ve seen (and especially this one). As I have been writing this response and considering what you have said, I just now see the need for some “time apart” in my own life. Willow Creek is gearing up to plant a new Willow Creek campus in Lake County, and I am very excited to be involved with it! Right now, though, I see the need to pace myself, so as not to burn out before it has even started.
In Christ (and from my own heart),
“you can come apart every once in a while, or you can just plain come apart.” — I love this Alex!! Such a good quote and reality. Thank you for your encouragement and yes I do know of Willow. I have been fortunate enough to get to know Hybels daughter Shauna on the Relevant Podcast this year.
Joy, I think just like everyone else this makes me both Happy and sad, but generally happy. Also.. I took my daughter to a cemetery about a month ago, it was our local National Cemetery. I’m pretty sure she thinks I’m just a weirdo now… but I’ve always loved that place. And lastly… in general conversation with my dad, on Christmas night, he started to tell me about a new dating website for people over 50. I’m 33.
We’ll be praying for you as you take your sabbatical!
My neighbor and I would stay up late, binging on joy Jiejie (Chinese name for older sister) videos… And I’ve kept up with you for quite some time now. I deeply appreciate your counsel and insight and your heart on these matters. Ive shared the love and respect message with so many and am grateful for it in my own life. Your emphasis on seeking counsel from older, wiser people has also been helpful and made me pursue .ore knowledgeable people in my life. Thank you. And thanks for being you… Im sire you hear it a lot but I think we would be fast friends in real life. Anyhow, I will be praying for you and asking that the Lord directs you.
Josi! Are you in China? I am no ones older sister but I will TAKE IT! Such a sweet compliment. Please keep having these conversations with your friends and even the younger “Jiejie’s” in your life. You are someones older wiser counsel. Thank you for the prayers, friend in online life. (-;
So excited for you in this new season, Joy! Can I just tell you how much I enjoyed this video? Highlight. Of. My day. So glad I watched (and I love that you resurrected a goodwill shirt from a previous video). You’re a gem. Maybe your sabbatical will leave time for some Prettyman’s dates?!
Joy, you have influenced me so much, especially your heart for finding truth. But this video, more than any, really made me think about how much I love to READ and LEARN, but how I don’t take time to just do that with God and not just relying on what another teacher says. And good for you for taking a sabbatical! Some friends of mine have a ministry based on that concept (CleftRock) and I’ve learned so much from them. Look forward to hearing where God leads you next!
Thank you so much for opening your heart… and I don’t mean only in this video, but in every single material you’ve published. I’m so thankful because you definitely have influenced me, and guided me, not to your advice, but God’s.
I watch your youtube channel from Cuernavaca (a mexican city)… and your videos have been igniters for me: they have encouraged me to dive the Word, live it and have helped me to show some perspectives at the momment I get to give advice to my peers. The thing I love the most is that these materials are so culturally relevant for our generation. Thank you.
This news make me happy and sand… at the same time… ha! To be honest, I’ll miss your mon morn uptdates! But I’m glad for your decision! Sometimes we need deserts… to rest, to get direction from God… Just like Jesus did: He would go alone to a desert-place, to pray, to rest from the multitude, to re-connet with the Father.
Be sure I am praying for you!!!! Thank you so much!!!
super thrilled for you and i feel weird saying this but i’ll totally miss you! If you’re ever in phoenix i’m inviting myself to coffee with you and Lindsey, haha!
I first started watching your youtube a few years ago in a season where I was seeking biblical advice on relationships and then i just kept on following your adventures. it was always so encouraging to hear a perspective from someone in my age group who I related to AND who wasn’t afraid to rock a mumu. also, thanks to you i will now have a solution next time my baguette goes stale.
i’ll be praying for you and enjoy this time! can’t wait to see what’s next.
I know I’m totally late here – but I was like “Where’s Joy?” So now I know. I hope whatever you do next, I can SEE you doing it! So whether it’s this, being the next (and best) Saturday Night Live cast member, or playing Lorelei Gilmore in a new kickstarter funded Gilmore Girls movie, please let us know where you are!!!
And since you signed off, I will sign off, too, using a nickname by husband once called me:
Joy Eggerichs’ Biggest Fan
Joy- I’m not in a place to listen to your video right now but I can only imagine from your words and the words of others that you are moving on from this venture or perhaps taking a much needed break, or maybe I should stop guessing:).
I know we’ve connected on here and in twitterland and although I don’t comment nearly as much as I read and listen on your site, know that your page has been an encouragement to me and you a faithful, funny friend (I’m sure it’s not weird to call someone I’ve not yet met a friend?!) in times of relationship ups and downs and learnings. And it’s because of you I started improv – which has come in handy many a time- so thank you, thank you for being a little push to keep going in the midst of what is the (often comical, mostly painful) turbulent years of dating. Bless you:).