I don’t know how Google searches for things so well, but since I have given my posts a lot of weird titles over the years, finding things by topic is like searching for Waldo in a candy cane store.

So, I wanted to put all the posts in one, easy-to-find place.

Hope this helps! Or you can keep using the search button–it’s kind of a fun game to see what comes up when you type in “UNICORNS.” Surprisingly, it’s a lot.

2014 (Year of the Horse)

Emerson & Sarah Eggerichs on Marriage, Parenting, Family of Origin, Work & Death: Interview with Emerson and Sarah Eggerichs, founders of Love and Respect (“The Mothership”)

Fighting for Love (and Other Potentially Hazardous Cliches): Joy shares her thoughts on cliché statements about life and love.

Eric Knox: Matchmaking, Marriage & Mentorship (And a Little NBA Action): Interview with Eric Knox, pastor at Imago Dei Community

He Said He Likes Me, But Nothing Happened. Tonight’s News With Joy Eggerichs: Dealing with ambiguous relationships

Online Dating: Not Your Grandma’s Way to Find a Spouse…Or Is It?: What does Joy think about online dating?

The Summer of Fun: A Love and Respect Now Online Dating Experiment: Documentary by Joy and a few of her friends about their experiences with online dating

Getting Past The First Date + An Interactive Practice Conversation: Getting past the first date, even if you’re a little socially awkward

Hail Gladdening Light (Phos Hilaron) – Arranged by Paul Ramey, Hannah Glavor and Tim Glavor: A secret song arranged for The Illumination Project is released!

Gabe & Rebekah Lyons on Starting Q, Starting Fights, & John Travolta: Interview with Gabe and Rebekah Lyons, founders of Qideas.

Respect Card? Was ist das?: Example of what a respect card can be and why respect can be valuable for a man

My Friends Have Better Lives: Choosing Joy over Jealousy, and GPS Tracking: How to deal with being the “last single standing”

Eric Metaxas: Marriage, Miracles & Movies: Interview with Bonhoeffer author, Eric Metaxas

The Real Reason People Ask About “The One”: Why are we all asking about “The One?”

Sseko Designs: How To Start a Company & Life as Husband & Wife: Interview with married, business partners Ben and Liz Bohannon

Amena Brown & Opdiggy: Falling In Love & Makin’ Music: Interview with married, collaborative artists Amena Brown and Opdiggy

Chores in Marriage: Create a Win-Win Situation With Your Spouse: Figuring out each other’s strengths in the first few months of marriage

How (Not) to Propose Like God by Joshua Ryan Butler: An analogy between proposal and some of the toughest themes of the Bible

Does Age Matter? Young Couples Getting Married, Maple Bacon Bars, & Eggs: When is it OK to get married young?

Rachel Ramsey Cruze: On Money, Relationships, and Upcoming SMART Conference: Interview with Rachel Cruze, daughter of Dave Ramsey

“Does He Like Me?” … Guys? Do You?: How to define an ambiguous relationship

The Good News About Marriage: Shaunti Feldhahn Interview: Interview with author, Shaunti Feldhahn

Signs of a Cheater: Seeing the Forest for the Trees and Eating Teacup Pigs: How to avoid being cheated on–live your relationships in the light

Mana by Preston Yancey: Finding God’s gifts in the ordinary

Age Segregation in America and the Church: How does age segregation impact the church? What will we do?

More Questions to Ask Before You Get Married: Wisdom with Preschoolers: Joy asks Brynn all the questions YOU think should be asked before marriage.

Did God Lie? When The One Walks Away: They’ve walked away, but does that mean God didn’t orchestrate the meeting?

Why L-O-V-E Spells T-I-M-E by Timothy Willard: Giving the gift of time to your spouse

Giving Relationship Advice: Your Story is Not Their Story: Chemistry as a litmus test and how to give/take advice

Is Chemistry Real? Laws of Attraction, Muumuus and Siblings: The science behind chemistry and when to give it a chance

He Shuts Me Down: How To Fight To Be an Ally with Your Guy: Use and abuse of the word “respect” + discernment

So Worth Loving: Eryn Erickson’s Illumination: Interview with the creator of So Worth Loving

3 Eggerichs Hangout, One walks into a…: Google+ Hangout with Joy, Emerson and Jonathan + the Love and Respect PODCAST

Why Am I Socially Awkward? How To Not Puke At Parties: Recap on the Art of Asking Questions

Unrequited Love: Advice on Loving Alone: What to do when love is not returned

Robin Williams: The Art and Curse of The Observer: Joy reflects on Robin Williams, comedy and bringing light to the world.

A Script for Marriage by Esther Fleece: Illumination on what God’s script for marriage is

Love Conquers All…or Does It?: Normie flips the tables and asks Joy some questions.

The Illumination Project: How’d It Go? Ginger Jokes and Wise Folks: Sydney & Crista share two different experiences of The Illumination Project.

Writer in Waiting: Update About My Book: The evolution and eventual pause of Joy’s book

Relevant Magazine & Podcast: Cameron Strang’s Illumination (+ Video Interview): Interview with Cameron Strang, creator of Relevant Magazine

Having a Lasting Marriage and Reaping What You Sow: One simple thing you can do to change your happiness in marriage

Problem Solving 101: Plywood Presents (+ Audio Interview): An interview with Jeff Shinabarger

What Red Flags Should I Look For? Tips for Relationships and Nascar: Green flags, yellow flags and red flags in relationships

You Make Me Brave by Annie Downs (+ Audio Interview): Encouragement to be brave + podcast recording with Annie Downs

2 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married: Two helpful questions to keep in your back pocket

Savior Complex, Anyone?: Finding balance between being the “Best Boyfriend” and smothering your girlfriend

Not Ready to Commit (And Other Stories From a Tomb Raider): Words for a guy who needs time and isn’t ready to commit

Is Love a Feeling? Balancing Butterflies by Andrea Lucado: Andrea’s illumination moment–relationships aren’t only about feelings

Obstacles to Marriage in the 21st Century: Why should you have hope for marriage?

Are We Officially Dating? Being Kept a Secret, Will Smith & Miles Davis: A “good” relationship probably shouldn’t be kept in the dark.

Seeing Through Rose-Colored Glasses–Ingredients for Entering Marriage And Staying There: What you need to know before and during marriage to stay married

The Bible Project, My Birthday, Bob Barker and a Gift for You!: A gift for you and a gift for Joy to celebrate her birthday

Father’s Day Gift Guide: 197 Things Cheaper Than Buying a New Tie: Giving the gift of respectful words to your father

Why Do We Have Weddings Anyway? Plus, Kicking Redheaded Flower Girls: Why do you attend weddings? Why throw a wedding?

Do I Need to Dumb Down to Find A Man? Or, Finding Mr. Moneybags: From a woman, “Do my academic achievements intimidate men?”

Be a Man for Your Wife by Timothy Willard: How service, repentance, and kind words can define manliness

Does Education Matter? Men, Women and Skipping Class: From a man, “How is more education for women going to impact future marriages?”

Can I Rebuild Trust? (+37 other Q&A’s) LIVE! Emerson & Joy answer YOU!: Another Google+ Hangout with Emerson and Joy

Letting Go of Perfection and Dealing with Reality–Illumination Guest: Aukelien van Abbema: Illumination moments on unrealistic expectations in singleness and dating

Mother’s Day Guide For Men via Jeff Tweedy: A word for men on how to write meaningful words to your mother

What Does Your Childhood Say About You?—Formal Lunch: A challenge to examine the formative moments of your childhood

Relationships Or Career? How To Become An Expert At Both: Ask Joy: Balancing time for relationships and careers

What I Know Now: Is He Marriage Material?: What do you wish you would have known? For women in serious relationships.

What I Know Now: Is She The One?: What do you wish you would have known? For men in serious relationships.

Would vs. Could— Men Say There’s A Difference: Ask men for help, but how you ask matters.

Dave Ramsey, Sean Connery, Your Relationship Questions & More: Ask Joy & Emerson: Joy and Emerson’s very first Google+ Hangout

Real Love: How Do You Know?— Emily Jamieson: Illumination Guest: A story on the choice to marry and the choice to love

Fear of Commitment? Ask Joy: What to do when one has an irrational fear that is impeding commitment.

Labels and Respectfully Confronting Friends: Ask Joy: When are generalizations good? Bad? How should we react to the “bad” ones?

Unrealistic Expectations? Ask Joy: How much should your spouse meet your emotional needs?

End of the Trail: Sarah Thebarge — Illumination Guest: Sarah shares a story of when a closed door turned out to be a gift.

Strengths Finder Personality Profile: Stuff I Like: How Joy’s strengths have changed over the past several years

Your Life Begins Today, Not at the Altar: Katelyn Beaty — Illumination Guest: How Katelyn’s beliefs about marriage and adulthood have shifted

The Honeymoon Stage Is Over—Does This Mean Our Marriage Is, Too? Ask Joy: In marriage, does “difficult season” = “wrong choice?”

How Do I Confront My Friends—Or Not? Ask Joy: How do you challenge and not shame your friends?

Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Deborah Tannen – Formal Lunch: Men vs. Women–conversation and body language + questions for you

My Married Friends Have Abandoned Me: Ask Joy: Conversation when you are the only single one in the room

Married and Mourning the Loss of Community: Ask Joy: When new marriage means loss of community

I Don’t Love You Anymore: What Happened? Ask Joy: Why do men cut off a relationship so quickly? How can women respond?

PMS: Is There Hope for Men? Ask Joy: Acknowledging and dealing with hormone-motivated mood swings

How to Approach an Irrational Man? Ask Joy: Addressing issues or fears when you don’t know what they are

Love and Respect: Loyalty Sealed the Deal: How attending a Love and Respect conference as a single gal affected Lindsay’s marriage

Valentine’s Day 2014: First Date, First Book, and a GIVEAWAY!: Joy shares the cover of her book.

Sweet 16 Pity Date: Two Versions: Joy and Justin tell two different stories of their first date.

Is Interracial Dating Okay? Ask Joy.: Joy shares her thoughts on interracial dating fifty years ago and now.

Formal Lunch: Emotional Connections Last Forever: Observe the human reaction to love and being intimately known.

Illumination Guest: Esther Havens – Illumination Around the World: Using photography to share others’ stories from around the world

Ask Joy: Everything I Do, I Do For Women!: Is your significant other your motivator or your savior?

Online “Comments” — Helpful or Hurtful?: Joy’s wish for better online rhetoric when we disagree

Jennie Allen and the Dreamers: Restless, IF:Gathering, and a GIVEAWAY: Who is Jennie Allen and what does she do?

One Word 365: Kindness and Heel Kicks: Choosing one word instead of an impossible New Year’s resolution.

New Year Resolution FAILS and Why I Won’t Make It as a Food Blogger: Joy’s resolution–assume the best.

Eric Metaxas Official Late Night Show: Special Guest Joy Eggerichs: What’s the difference between LRN, The Illumination Project and Joy’s book?

Ask Joy: Chill Out, Richard!: How do you let a guy down nicely?

Ask Joy: Humble Arrogance and Staying Away from Girls: Dealing with the flattery when someone likes you

2013 (Year of the Unicorn)

Illumination Guest: Fritz Ridenour – Illumination Beyond Marriage: Reflections during and after 56 years of marriage

The Giver: What does your heart look like when you give?

The Illumination Project: A Thankful Thanksgiving.: Happy Thanksgiving + thoughts + presents for you

The Illumination Project: All Your Questions, ANSWERED (maybe): FAQ on The Illumination Project

What I Know Now: New Moms, Lessons From a Fifth Grader: What do you wish you would have known? For new moms.

What I Know Now: New Dads, Put Pegs in the Floor: What do you wish you would have known? For new dads.

What I Know Now: Newly Married Ladies and Joy’s Response to Sad Stories: What do you wish you would have known? For newly married women.

What I Know Now: Newly Married Men and Déjà Vu Conversations: What do you wish you would have known? For newly married men.

What I Know Now: Single Ladies, You Don’t Have to Marry Them!: What do you wish you would have known? For single ladies.

What I Know Now: Single Men, Keep Your Shirts On: What do you wish you would have known? For single men.

Ask Joy: Confronting Parents—Yay or Nay?: How do you confront your parents and still honor them?

Illumination Guest: Karyn Thurston – Finding Your Light: When to be seen and when to surrender the spotlight

Got Nerves? The Psychology Behind Those First-date Jitters: Infographic about those first date jitters

Ask Joy: Paralyzed by Parents’ Divorce: Not letting wounds from the past impact the present

Illumination Guest: Diane Paddison – When God Turns on the Light: How God created a nonprofit out of Diane’s joblessness

Ask Joy: Which Comes First, Love or Respect?: Who moves first? The one who is most mature.

Illumination Guest: Sarah Collins – A Fortress for Love: Observations on affection and love throughout the world

RSOTU: Fear Impacting Respect: Flashback to the question, “Do past hurts or fears impact how we understand respect?”

Formal Lunch: The Name’s Bond, James Bond.: Pet-perks vs. pet peeves and a challenge to ask questions and listen well

Intimately Known: A prayer that we may be intimately known today

Illumination Guest: Timothy Willard – Naked I Jump: Moments of joy inside and outside of marriage

Joy & Steph: Album 2.0: Thanking Steph as she transitions out

Ask Joy: Single and (Not) Ready to Mingle: Finding balance between your current relationship status and your relationship desires

The Illumination Project: Pre-Order Party!: The Illumination Project Arrives + birthday discount

Ask Joy: Fear and the Tick, Tock of my Girlfriend’s Baby Clock: Helping a girl relinquish her fears

Joy Asks Rick…and a GIVEAWAY: Announcement that Rick McKinley is re-releasing his first book

Ask Joy: Does Newly Married = No More Friends?: Maintaining friendships regardless of relationship status + “grass is greener” syndrome

C.S. Lewis – The Thrill: Initial, fluttering, thrilling love vs. love that lasts

Ask Joy: On Alfredo Sauce and Being Intentional: Being intentional and growing in all aspects of your relationship

Illumination Guest: Katie Locke – A Radio Truth: How the Love and Respect message affected Katie as a single and married person

Cat Lady, Part 3: Gratitude when life isn’t turning out as planned

Cat Lady, Part 2: Becoming the kind of partner you want to be with

Cat Lady, Part 1: Not wasting your alone time as a single person

Ask Joy: Online Dating UPDATE: Joy gave online dating a shot–here are the results.

Formal Lunch: I Want to Roast Marshmallows, too!: Don’t exclude invitations based on relationship status or kiddos

Illumination Guest: Guy Chmieleski – God’s Workshop: Marriage and dating when you’re a “work in progress”

Understanding Your Brain: Recommended books and TED Talks

Illumination Guest: Emily Maynard – Saying No to Negativity: Choosing not to make negative generalizations about men or women

Ask Joy: Respect for Women, too?: Clarifying what respect means to women and men

Illumination Guest: Paul Angone – Why Finding Your Passion is Not Sexy: Thoughts on the twenty-something process of building a life

Ask Joy: I’m a Flirt…or am I?: Flirting vs. Friendliness + how to tell the difference

Illumination Guest: Benny Fountain – Kitchen Series: A series of paintings on how past experiences shape your vision

Ask Joy: Just Give It A Chance: Responses to the phrase, “just give it a chance!” + others setting you up

Illumination Guest: Sarah Markley – Living Life in a Mercury-Vaporized World: The “in-between” when current life seems far away from your dreams

Delay is Not Denial: Thoughts for when God seems to be taking His time

Guest Post: Converge Magazine: Joy’s interview with Chelsea Batten of Converge Magazine

MY BIRTHDAY (and Steph’s Half-Birthday) WISH: Joy’s challenge for YOU–seek wise counsel

Illumination Guest: Eric Metaxas – Impromptu Interview: Interview between Eric Metaxas, Justin Zoradi and Joy

Formal Lunch: Pink vs. Blue: A challenge to help understand gender differences

Illumination Guest: Propaganda – Be Present: A spoken word piece on being present amidst technology

Ask Joy: Heartbroken and Angry: Dealing with the anger you’re feeling over a broken heart

Illumination Guest: Mike Pacchione – When the Clock Runs Out: The lightbulb moment that made Mike believe in Jesus

Ask Joy: I Refuse: The value of respect, friendship and shoulder-to-shoulder time for a man

For the Unsung Hero: Epoch 2013: Nominate an unsung hero to win some of $50,000 to support their efforts.

Ask Joy: You’re Always Right: Getting off of the Crazy Cycle, even if the other person is wrong

Illumination Guest: Janel Kaden – Love Light: A pop art piece contributed for The Illumination Series

The Illumination Project. What’s that? I’ll tell you: Answering all of your questions about The Illumination Project

Ask Joy: Asks YOU! Was it a Date?: How do you define a date? How do you clarify when it becomes unclear?

Illumination Guest: Brad Lomenick – 5 Illuminating Lessons Learned in My 20′s: 5 Lessons Brad learned in his 20s + his beatboxing skills

Ask Joy: Do You Love Me?: How do you and your significant other know when to say “I love you?”

Illumination Guest: Verily – A Women’s Magazine: An interview with the creator of Verily Magazine.

Ask Joy: Horny Toad: Setting boundaries in a once-sexual relationship–why should you?

Illumination Guest: Bearings – A Men’s Magazine: An interview with the creator of Bearings Magazine

A Few Questions For God: Joy shares her talk at Liberty University’s Convocation

Illumination Guest: Blair Jacobson — Expectations: Wanting a relationship vs. wanting a person

Julie Burleson: Planning a Wedding…on a Budget: Practical tips for planning an inexpensive and fun wedding.

Ask Joy: Some Thoughts On Mentoring: Leading and mentoring a very diverse small group

Stuff I Like: Love Gives Way: An organization that helps weddings serve something bigger

Iceland, Pornography, and Vintage Videos: What happens to our brain when we view porn

I’M GETTING MARRIED!!: Joy announces her book!

Illumination Guest: Jeff Shinabarger – Treasure or Trash?: The power of asking and the power of generosity

Ask Joy: Conflicts in Communication—The Stonewall: Identifying fear of conflict and seeking healing

Illumination Guest: Lesley Miller – Fighting the Good Fight: The importance of talking through the tough stuff

Ask Joy: Material Girls in a Material World: How deep-seated insecurities can cause someone to be overly sensitive

Illumination Guest: Jeremy Gordon – A Seed: A song on patient expectation and growth

Ask Joy: Political Punches or Partisanship?: Agreeing and disagreeing on “hot topics”

Valentine’s Gone Very Wrong. Plus 11 Giveaways.: Some cards to help you not take this holiday too seriously

Ask Joy: Trust Me: Understanding each other’s needs during conflict

Illumination Guest: Jeff Manion – A Greenhouse for Growth: It’s not your hardship that shapes you, but your reaction to it.

Ask Joy: Don’t Macaulay Culkin Your Parents: As an adult, do you still need to obey your parents?

This is Dignity – Bangladesh Day 4: Ways that many women become self-sustaining through support from FH

Marriage, Baby Tinkles, and Mutual Love of Gold – Bangladesh Day 3: Stories of women seeking to change the fabric of their society

The Legend of Fulmoti & Joy – Bangladesh Day 2: Joy shares games with her sponsored child and village

Power of Language – Bangladesh Day 1: The history of language in Bangladesh + meeting Joy’s new friends

Karen’s Top 5 Albums of 2012: Intern Karen shares the soundtracks to her year

Ask Joy: Leading On: Addressing the fear of leading someone on

Illumination Guests: Justin and Trisha Davis – What I Wish I Knew: Five things one couple wished they knew before marriage

Don’t Be a Fool Like Me, in 2013: Cooling down vs. quickly reacting

2012 (Year of the Frog Prince of Bel Air)

2012 Sign-Off & Walter Update: Challenge to reflect on what you’ve learned

Stuff I Like: Muslims: Joy announces her future travels to Bangladesh

Joy & Stephanie – Voices of Angels: A little extra Thanksgiving/Christmas video gift

Ask Joy: Do I Like Him Enough?: Knowing your motivation when saying ‘yes’ to a date.

Illumination Guest: Becca Blevins – Quiet and Light: Our design for balance of rest, play and hard work.

Ask Joy: How Do I Know If She’s Interested?: Helping each other out to ask each other out

Illumination Guest: Diane Comer – Regarding Him: When you’re communicating and over-communicating

Hierarchy: Part 2: Thanking men for their desire to protect

Hierarchy: Part 1: Understanding a man’s sense of responsibility when it comes to protecting women

Illumination Guest: Joshua Chang – Know Your Self-Worth: Knowing God’s design for marriage and our value to Him

Illumination Guest: Bianca Olthoff – It’s Just Coffee: Getting out of the pressure of a simple date

Ask Joy: ATB: Assuming the best in others + pouring salt in the wound

Illumination Guest: Jon Acuff – My First Book: Two moments that inspired Jon to become a published author

Mending the Soul: Thoughts on wounds, rebuilding trust and abuse

Catalyst and My Time With Beyonce: Serving as a young leader + some advice

Ask Joy: Call Me Maybe: What is the best way to ask a girl out? How can you be more clear?

Illumination Guest: Sharaya Mikael – Million Miles: Sharaya imagines what it looks like to be in love and be truly known.

Illumination Guest: Josh Straub – Old-School Cameras, Fanny Packs, and Jesus: Practical ways that we can love others and make them well-formed in Christ

Ask Joy: Online Woes: They’ve been dating for 4 months, but he still logs into an online dating site daily.

The Illumination Project Highlight Reel: Highlights from the live filming

Ask Joy: Mixed Signals: Dealing with and discerning mixed signals in dating

Interview: Catalyst Atlanta Speaker Spotlight: Joy shares a Catalyst interview

Illumination Guest: Alece Ronzino – Respect Thrown In My Face: Unconditional respect without condoning wrong behavior

Ask Joy: Billy Doesn’t Date: What does the Bible say about dating? Courtship?

Illumination Guest: Josh White – Wounded Healer: Josh White shares music and a poetic piece for The Illumination Project

Ask Joy: Facebook Feud: Dealing wisely with hurt and unexpected rejection

Illumination Guest: Rachel Cruze – Common “Cents”: Illumination about this generation’s attitude towards money

Ask Joy: Mini-Men and Small Man Syndrome: How to act as a woman working in a primarily male environment

Illumination Guest: Hannah Joiner – Above The Noise: Finding your own answers and avoiding comparison

Ask Joy: Translating the Transaction: Splitting the bill (before the first date)

Effective Ways to Engage Your Father: Practical, engaging questions to ask your father

What’s This Formal Lunch Business??: Joy introduces the Formal Lunch

Illumination Guest: Ken Canfield: What do fathers contribute to a daughter’s well-being?

A New Kind of Bachelorette: Lessons on friendliness from The Bachelorette

Illumination Guest: Josh Hoke- I Need Your Love: Josh Hoke on needing love without letting it become your savior

Till Death Do We Part: Why attend weddings? Why throw a wedding?

Illumination Guest: Anna Quinlan – Divorce is a Choice: Regardless of family history or the current disagreement, you can choose marriage.

Ask Joy: Is She too Good for Me?: When to ask her out and a few reasons to be more confident

Illumination Project: Todd Arnold – “Missed” Communication: Illumination guest shares an art piece on gender differences and missed communication.

The Illumination Project: Revealed!: Joy introduces The Illumination Project for the first time.

Briefing & Bloopers: Signing off for June 2012

Ask Joy: Cross Cultural Conundrum: Cross-cultural differences in relationships

Ask Joy: If You’re Such An Expert…: If Joy is such an expert on relationships and marriage, why isn’t she married?

Lessons from John Maxwell & a Four-Year-Old: The art of asking good questions

Ask Joy: Feelings for a Friend: Pursuit, getting out of the friend zone and being more than “just friends”

Ask Joy: Overly Emotional: Male/female differences in processing emotions in the context of a relationship

The Beauty of #MMM: Joy shares the results of her social media experiment.

Guest Post: Mother’s Day & My Mommacita: Tips for how sons can make their mothers feel loved on Mother’s Day

May’s Mundane Monday aka #MMM: Joy proposes a social media experiment.

Ask Joy: Anger & Abuse: Identifying and reacting to an abusive relationship

Ask Joy: How to Romance a Woman: Outside of formulas, what actually adds to the romance?

Ask Joy: Independent “I Don’t Need a Man” Woman: Is it possible to change your reputation? How?

Ask Joy: ASKS YOU! Culture, Sexuality & Me Monsters: Questions on societal individualism and its relational effects

Ask Joy: Do I Love Him Enough?: Expectations of your future spouse

Ask Joy: Video Games: Why do so many men still play video games?

Ask Joy: Relationship…or Lack Thereof…: He talked to her more, but asked her friend out instead. Say what?!

Ask Joy: Spiritual Boundaries: Rules for spiritual boundaries in dating–yes or no?

Cycle Stopper: Be a Wounded Healer: How do you heal from relational wounds?

Ask Joy: Red Flags: If a relationship doesn’t have any major red flags, why end it?

Stuff I Like: The Hunger Games: The Hunger Games as a generational social commentary

Guest Post: “In Love” by Lisa “Marie” Armour: What does “in love” really mean?

Submission Series Part 3: Design & Value: Is this “submission” thing really a part of God’s design?

Submission Series Part 2: Fear & Misunderstanding: Possible fears and misunderstandings of the word “submission”

Submission Series Part 1: Mutual Submission: What is mutual submission and why should we care?

Ask Joy: Women Watching Porn: Effects on women of watching pornography

Ask Joy: My Ideal Man: What does Joy want in a man?

Shame Lifter: A book recommendation

Paul Angone: And The Four Will Become One: Why is the search for “The One” so hard?

Guest Post: At The Lord’s Table: Why are churchgoers often wounded? What should be done?

Ask Joy: Hoping for Holly Homemaker: How to have a conversation about the woman staying at home

Valentine’s Day Post: Make Love Today: A challenge to share love whether you love or love to hate Valentine’s Day

Ask Joy: Asking Good Questions: How do you ask good questions?

Ask Joy: Holy Break Up!: How not to break up with someone

Pinky Sent Me: Why you should engage in the Love and Respect message

2011 (Year of the Koi)

Christmas Wishes and Musical Gifts: Joy signs off and shares her Christmas wish.

Joy Asks Rick: Joy interviews Rick McKinley about his book.

Radical and Unconditional: POTSC: Joy shares the Love and Respect message with People of the Second Chance

My Love Story: Waiting with a Purpose: Joy’s love story in a guest post for another blog

L’Abri Revisited. Guest Post: Val: How Love and Respect started her relationship off right

Can Guys & Girls Be Friends? Question #6: My friend of the opposite sex is in a committed relationship now. Can we still be friends?

Can Guys & Girls Be Friends? Question #5: My BF/GF has issues with me being friends with a particular person of the opposite sex. How should I handle it?

Can Guys & Girls Be Friends? Question #4: We used to date. Can we be friends?

Can Guys & Girls Be Friends? Question #3: We are both single and hang out all the time. So what?!

Emerson Eggerichs vs. Captain Picard: Love and Respect Conferences vs. Star Trek

Can Guys & Girls Be Friends? Question #2: Sally likes me, and I don’t like her. Can we be friends?

Can Guys & Girls Be Friends? Question #1: I like Sally, she doesn’t like me. Can we be friends?

Can Guys & Girls Be Friends: Intro: Series kickoff–Can Guys and Girls Be Friends?

Where the Singles At?? Guest Post: Renea McKenzie: What can single people learn at a marriage conference?

A Singled Out Sunday: Wrestling with singleness and marriage is where we can encounter the Gospel.

Ask Joy: Cohabitation Conundrums: What to say when your friend/child is making a choice you don’t want them to make

Ask Joy: Seek Him to Find Her: Thoughts on the phrase, “a girl’s heart should be so wrapped up in the Lord, that a guy should have to seek Him to find her.”

Stuff I Like: Needtobreathe: Joy shares a song she’s listened to 4,534,309,672 times.

What’s AACC?: Traveling to AACC and starting a conversation about it

Ask Joy: Right Thing, Wrong Time?: Is the right thing at the wrong time actually the wrong thing?

Ask Joy: ASKS YOU! Desperate Damsel?: How do you let him know you’re interested in him without looking desperate?

Ask Joy: Seeking Signs: How do you know if you’ve heard from God before entering into a relationship?

Ask Joy: Wise Counsel Woes: When your sources for wise counsel disagree

Ask Joy: E-Harmony Hang Ups: Thoughts on online dating sites

Guest Post: “The Male Factor”: Stephanie reviews the book by Shaunti Feldhahn

Ask Joy: Fumbling Friend: What do you say to a friend who is dating a non-Christ-follower?

Guest Post: Singled Out Stephanie: A single’s review of the Love and Respect Small Group DVD Series

Who Pursues? Part 2: What prevents you from pursuing/being pursued?

Summer School With June: A letter to Joy’s friend, June, about the months before her death

Who Pursues? Part 1: Scripture doesn’t say the man has to pursue!

C.S. Lewis: The Thrill: C.S. Lewis on the thrill of love

C.S. Lewis: On Love: C.S. Lewis on being in love and staying there

God Is My Big Bully: How do you forgive people who have hurt you?

Stuff I Like: England, Guinness & Unicorns: Joy shares travel recommendations for the London-y Oxford area.

Guest Post: Erin Hobbie – Trust Me: Trusting God as an “older single”

RSOTU: Follow Up with Emerson Eggerichs Pt 2: What to say when guys respond with, “Yeah! You should respect me, woman!”

RSOTU: Follow Up with Emerson Eggerichs Pt 1: How does a woman practically and tangibly show respect in a relationship?

Guest Post: All Groan Up: Interview with fellow Westmont Alum, Paul Angone

Guest Post: 4Word Women: Joy’s interview with 4word Women

Ask Joy: Crazy Controlling Cleo: Salvaging a relationship when one person is really controlling

Emotional Boundaries or “How to Chat in a Cemetery.”: Knowing when and how to share things in a relationship

Gang Member’s Guest Post Pt 2: Sharideth Shares: Interview with Sharideth Smith

Gang Member’s Guest Post Pt 1: Deep Thoughts By David: Interview with David T. Robbins

Ask Joy: What Does Weird Wally Do?: Dealing with your significant other’s weird secrets

Wedding Wha! Ha! Ha!: Funny wedding photos to make you laugh

Wedding Season “Choose Your Own Adventure”: Choose your own adventure before your next wedding.

Know Me: Art of Asking Questions & Listening Part 3: Asking questions and listening to seek wisdom from others

Know Me: Art of Asking Questions & Listening Part 2: Asking questions and listening in dating

Know Me: Art of Asking Questions & Listening Part 1: Asking questions and listening during mingle time

Ask Joy: ASKS YOU! Little Miss Eager: She wants to be married now, but he says “patience is a virtue.”

Ask Joy: “I can’t believe you’re still single?!”: Handling the “I can’t believe you’re still single!” comments

Ask Joy: Guard Your Heart: What does “guard your heart” actualllly mean?

Ask Joy: Tough Talk Pt 3: Shocked: What do you do when your struggles look different from his?

Ask Joy: Tough Talk Pt 2: Should I?: Bringing up a hard conversation + vulnerability vs. transparency

Ask Joy: Tough Talk Pt 1: Safety: Getting a guy to open up with shoulder-to-shoulder activities

RSOTU: Guys Response (Pt. 15 of 15): Guys address when a girl might be fearful of showing respect.

RSOTU: Guys Response (Pt. 14 of 15): Guys share how to show respect with a look and with words.

RSOTU: Guys Response (Pt. 13 of 15): Guys share how to show respect by affirming guy friends and guy time.

RSOTU: Guys Response (Pt. 12 of 15): Guys share specific stories of when they were respected/disrespected.

RSOTU: Guys Response (Pt. 11 of 15): Guys share their relationship status & what makes them feel respected.

RSOTU: Respect Letter (Pt. 10 of 15): What is a respect letter and how do you write it?

RSOTU: Disrespectful Attitude (Pt. 9 of 15): What does a disrespectful attitude look like? You’ll see.

RSOTU: Is Respect Giving In? (Pt. 8 of 15): Communicating with respect when it doesn’t seem fair

RSOTU: Practical Ways To Show Respect (Pt. 7 of 15): For women it’s easy to show love, but how do you show respect?

RSOTU: Respectfully Decline Date (Pt. 6 of 15): Respectfully declining a date and possible unrealistic expectations

RSOTU: Respect Unkind Words (Pt. 5 of 15): Wise and respectful ways to confront hurtful communication

RSOTU: Respect When We Don’t Feel Loved (Pt. 4 of 15): Showing respect when something makes you feel unloved

RSOTU: Social Cues for Showing Respect (3 of 15): Showing respect to a guy you’ve just met

RSOTU: Fear Impacting Respect (Pt. 2 of 15): Do past hurts or fears impact how we understand respect?

Respect State of The Union: Intro (Pt. 1 of 15): Introduction to a 15-part series about the word “Respect.” Oy!

Ask Joy: ASKS YOU! Not Normal Ned: Is it normal if you’re ______ years old and have never dated?

Ask Joy: Shuttin’ Sexuality Down: How can you be sexual without having sex?

Ask Joy: God’s Symphony Gone Flat?: What if you thought God brought you together, but then he walks away?

Stuff I Like: Strengths Finder Personality Profile: Strengths Finder + identifying what we’re bringing to the table

Ask Joy: Fooled by Facebook: How to stop getting emotionally attached to guys on Facebook

Ask Joy: Wedding? Why?: Is it OK if you want to be single your whole life?

The One: Part 3 – What If There’s No-One?: How to respond if you feel like there’s no one

Do Age Differences Matter? Ask Joy: How old is too old? How young is too young?

The One: Part 2 – “How Do I Know?”: How do you know that the one is “The One?”

Ask Joy: Twitter Answer: Joy answers #AskJoys in tweets.

Ask Joy: Getting Set Up On The Commune: Single? How to encourage and be encouraged by your community. And get set up.

The One: Part 1 – “Is There Only One?”: Should we be looking for “the one?”

Ask Joy: Lusting Larry, Fearful Fawn & J Crew Carl (Pt. 4): Understanding our different designs when it comes to sex

Ask Joy: Lusting Larry, Fearful Fawn & J Crew Carl (Pt. 3): Men and women are equally sexual, but stimulated differently.

Ask Joy: Lusting Larry, Fearful Fawn & J Crew Carl (Pt. 2): Why aren’t girls turned on by looks as much as guys are?

Ask Joy: Lusting Larry, Fearful Fawn & J Crew Carl (Pt. 1): What is the purpose of lust?

Ask Joy: Thai Food, Coffee Shops, and Yokes: Faith differences in dating

Ask Joy: Texting Tantrum: Fighting over text and how to stop

So Now What? (Part 5 of 5): How do you empower and support a man?

So Now What? (Part 4 of 5): We need to change our actions instead of being cynical.

So Now What? (Part 3 of 5): Fear can create generalizations. Don’t do it.

So Now What? (Part 2 of 5): Some articles and research can be one-sided.

So Now Wbhat? (Part 1 of 5): Joy responds to an article asking, “Where Have All The Good Men Gone?”

Ask Joy: ASKS YOU! Playing Hard To Get?: Why is it that we are interested in someone until they show interest back — and then we put our guard up?

Ask Joy: Get off Me Shikona!: Giving up your life plans for a guy or girl–is this ever right?

Ask Joy: Dr. Jekyll, Mr. Hyde, and Whiskey: Showing respect when it isn’t easy or deserved

Get Behind Me You Sedan Salesman!: The tension between autonomy and authority

Ask Joy: Church Creeper x2: Advice for when you don’t know a guy super well, but he wants to go on a date

Stuff I Like: Page CXVI: Joy shares another one of her favorite bands.

Ask Joy: Lonely and Line Dancing: Advice for a girl who has never been in a relationship

Guest Post: For Imago Dei Women: Five traits of people who do well in the tension of being single

Ask Joy: Can Anxious Andy Commit?: Does doubt-free, 100% commitment actually exist?

Ask Joy: My Head Told My Heart: Why is it so hard to let go of feelings for someone you know isn’t good for you?

Ten Thoughts From Joy On Valentine’s Day: Thoughts on pink, office dynamics and 2/14

Ask Joy: Premarital Sex and Your Local Library: What does the Bible say about premarital sex?

Ask Joy: I Will Rip Out Your Little Red Ponytail!: They aren’t married yet for financial reasons. Is this OK?

Ask Joy: Friends Who Sing About Macaroni: She likes him. She’s not sure if he reciprocates. What should she do?

Ask Joy: Johnny, Facebook and Porn, Oh My!: When the grass looks greener on the other side and you can’t deal with reality.

Ask Joy: Keg Stands and Strippers: Approaching the conversation when you don’t feel comfortable with bachelor/bachelorette parties

Ask Joy: Nice Guy Ned: Encouragement for the “nice guys” who might be feeling discouraged

Ask Joy: 18 and Ready to Wed: Red flags and green flags if you’re wanting to marry young

Ask Joy: “Kind of Accidentally”: Hookup culture and what to do after it “happens”

Ask Joy: Long Distance Three Armed Love: A few factors to consider with long-distance dating

Stuff I Like: Destiny Craft Her Pants: Destiny’s awesome crafting blog

Ask Joy: Craving Air: What to do if he’d “rather be loved than respected”

Ask Joy: Block Throwin’ Billy: Encouraging a husband in parenting

Ask Joy: Girl Power and Boy Belief: Shifting the generalization that “all men are childish”

Ask Joy: Women Who Fall and Men Who Are Tall: Generalizations men make about women (and vice versa)

2010 (Year of the First iPad)

Top Ten of 2010: Top posts and weird searches of 2010

Ask Joy: Phone Conversations and Porn Confrontations: Separating trust and respect when a husband uses porn

Ask Joy: Not a Fan of My Baby Boy’s Babe: Guiding a son through a serious relationship. Advice for moms.

Ask Joy: Welcoming Skeletons: Advice for a girl who just got out of a bad relationship and is not a virgin anymore

Stuff I Like: Free CD’s and My First Nephew: Joy shares a (once free) album and a letter to her nephew.

Ask Joy: Fighting Ain’t Right! (or is it?): When is conflict healthy or unhealthy?

Ask Joy: No Boys?: Do your own Formal Lunch.

Formal Lunch – Part 6: The Dating Game: Joy, Erin and Jenny discuss how to glorify God in dating.

Formal Lunch – Part 5: Healthy, God-Centered Sexuality Continued: The black, white and grey of sexuality

Formal Lunch – Part 4: Healthy, God-Centered Sexuality: What to do with sexuality when single

Formal Lunch – Part 3: Peace, Feelings & Dating: “Having peace” and feelings when dating

Formal Lunch – Part 2: Communication with Men: Asking men how they want to be respected

Formal Lunch – Part 1: Loving Men: Loving men well when single.

Ask Joy: Tear Jerk-er: Some advice on giving advice

Stuff I Like: Pilgrims and Fly Girls: Joy shares a video from Con Bro Chill, and she’s in it.

Ask Joy: Biceps and Big Brains: Sharing intimate details of past relationships

Ask Joy: I Cheated. Can I call her now?: Advice to a guy who recently cheated and wants forgiveness

Stuff I Like: Julie and her Craftmazement: Apartment inspiration from Joy’s friend, Julie

Ask Joy: Salt in the Wound: Tips for how to guide someone through past pains

Ask Joy: 36-24-36…only if she’s 5’3!: The importance of physical beauty

Ask Joy: Ehartmatchemistry.com: The pros and cons of online dating

3 Things I Have Learned While Being Single: Joy shares things to learn from singleness.

Stuff I Like: Erin Hobbie: A poem and two videos with Joy’s friend, Erin

Ask Joy: Tour de Chivalry: What does “chivalry” look like today?

Ask Joy: Will It Work?: Can respect be used to win a guy back?

Ask Joy: I Want Your Body. No Wait, I Don’t: What does sexual attraction look like 5 years into marriage?

Ask Joy: Definition of Love and Crazies: What does it mean to be “madly in love?”

Stuff I Like: My Sweet Carolyne – A Follower: Joy shares the story of when her friend, Carolyne, thought she had snuck out.

Daddy-Daughter-Discussion: Emerson interviews Joy on how respect actually empowers women.

Stuff Joy Likes: Air Hockey and A Homily: Reflections from Joy and Mike on a recent wedding

Ask Joy: How To Break It Off?: Breakups “when you just aren’t feeling it”

Guest Blogger: Morgan Van Epp Cutlip: Morgan discusses hope for marriage.

Ask Joy: Is This Meant To Be? : Joy and Emerson discuss marital tensions and how to work through it.

Stuff I Like: Thad Cockerell: Joy shares why she adores Thad Cockerell’s music.

My Story: Why Joy created Love and Respect Now

Stuff I Like: How to be Alone: A popular video on how to be alone

Safe Identity: How past loves can shape our identity

Stuff I Like: Women: Joy reflects on a recent speaking engagement.

Ask Joy: Gender Stereotypes?: The pros and cons of gender stereotypes

Stuff I Like: Tripp’s Blog: A comedy blog that is totally worth your time

Fro Yo and Respect: Joy shares a conversation about respect.

Eat, Pray, Love it?: Review of the book Eat, Pray, Love and some questions for you

Stuff I Like: Bonhoeffer Bio: Joy’s love for Hitler, WWII and Bonhoeffer

Jerk?: The implication of saying, “Guys are jerks!”

Stuff I Like: Jerks: Thoughts on the book How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk

MY RESPONSE: Calling All Guyyyyys….: Joy answers questions submitted by the guys.

Stuff I Like: Quotes: Discussion on a quote about marriage and this generation

Floating Ideas….: Discernment in the “information age”

Calling All Guyyyyyys….: Call for questions from guys who want to get in the head of women

Stuff I Like: Gender Stereotypes Take II: Another funny video about gender stereotypes

Stuff I Like: Inception: Review of the “new” movie, Inception

Ask Joy: Should I Dance?: Respectfully communicating a challenging topic & building trust

Stuff I Like: “Harmony Called Me”: Joy discusses tunes from her friend, “Ragnar.”

Singleness and the Church: BELIEF… and the ready to wed.: What to do if you aren’t satisfied with being single

Singleness and the Church: BELIEF… and the satisfied single: What it looks like to be a “satisfied single”

Stuff I Like: Fenelon: A letter by Francois de Salignac de La Mothe Fenelon

A bit more of my story…: Joy shares her story + a slew of guest posts.

Stuff I Like: R & R: Why anticipation of vacation is the best part

Stuff I Like: All for me! (Mixed CD’s and more): Joy shares her love for mixed CD’s + a new song.

Singleness and the Church: Part II: Results of Joy’s research on singleness & the church

Stuff I Like: Long Earlobes: Timeless wisdom from John Wooden

Ask Joy: Move For Boyfriend?: Being obedient in dating, while also experiencing freedom

Stuff I Like: Old Stories: Why Joy likes to re-read things

Singleness and the Church: A Helping Hand May Help: Joy discusses her research on singleness and the church.

Stuff I Like: Blood and the Middle East: Joy discusses the band “Middle East,” and the song “Blood.” (Geez, guys.)

Is Respect Only Earned?: The biblical command to unconditionally…respect

Stuff I Like: Reconnecting and Ruminate: Discussion of the magazine, Ruminate

Ask Joy: Fickle Men: Why we can’t say, “All men are fickle men.”

Stuff I Like: Jack Johnson & His Wedding Ring: The very first time Joy heard Jack Johnson

NEW, NOW & LATER: Why we should work to make relationships last

Stuff I Like: Opening Bands: Joy discusses all things SeaBird.

Ask Joy: Emotional Boundaries: Emotional boundaries in dating–whaaaat??

Stuff I Like: Games: New, important games such as soccer tennis

What’s Your Romance Novel?: Thoughts on romance novels and unrealistic expectations

Stuff I Like: Mauve and Teal: Why choose this church over that church?

I Have Seen..: Joy writes a poem!

Stuff I Like: Old Men: Why Joy likes to visit the retirement home

Ask Joy: Why Are Women Mentally Incompetent?: Why women are actually quite mentally competent

Stuff I Like: Michigan State University: The difference between MSU and U of M–you should know this.

Analyze this…: The value of wise counsel during breakups

Stuff I Like: Gender Stereotypes: Joy shares a funny video about gender stereotypes.

Five Again: Joy shares how she came to faith at the age of five.

Stuff I Like: Music Videos: The music of Joy’s friend, Sam Martin

Ask Joy: Mommy Me: Some words of encouragement for single moms

Stuff I Like: Lil’ White Chapel: The story of The Chapel That Didn’t Burn

Fantasy is Not Reality: How is porn affecting this generation?

Stuff I Like: Eating With Friends: Joy’s love of breakfast and a challenge for you

I Understand…: The unknowns of faith and the walk of the disciples

Stuff I Like: Listening Ladies: A passage from one of Joy’s favorite devotionals, God Calling

If by “Magical” you mean…: Discussion of the “magic” of falling in love on The Bachelor

Stuff I Like: Music: Joy shares her love of Annie Bethancourt.

Ask Joy: Any Dude?: How do you know if this guy is the one God wants for you?

Stuff I Like: A Book: Why We Love the Church by Kevin DeYoung and Ted Kluck

She’s a Man-Hater: The risk of making extreme statements about gender

Stuff I Like: Built in Bookshelves: Joy shares why she loves built-in bookshelves. (Hint: Cozy)

My State of the Union: What’s going on in week 6 of 2010?

Stuff I Like: Younicornme: That one time Joy’s favorite app went live

What Are You Fighting For?: The value of submitting to authority

Stuff I Like: Mumford and Sons: Joy discusses the lyrics of Mumford and Sons.

Swim, baby, swim!: Joy writes a letter to Christians who are encouraging divorce.

“I Have Trust Issues” Pt. 3: Joy discusses how authentic community builds trust.

Stuff I like: Stephanie Bassos Photography: Joy shares art from an old friend.

Please…I beg of you, put your money & prayers where your mouth is: Pat Robertson-bashing and Christian love

500 Days of Summer: Film Review: Joy reviews the movie, “500 Days of Summer.”

“I Have Trust Issues” Pt. 2: How does current media affect how we trust one another?

“I Have Trust Issues” Pt. 1: Joy discusses the societal and relational implications of distrust.

20000000009!!! (Or something like that)

“Joy, Why Are You Doing This?”: Introducing the “Ask Joy” section of the site

All I want for Christmas: Joy hopes you will feel the love and peace of Christ.

The Look: Expectations in dating and “needy” people

Hug It Out: Healthy physical touch and the power of the hug

It’s been a hard days night: Music & verses for when it’s been “one of those days”

Advent Conspiracy: Tis the Season: How can gift-giving reflect what we believe?

Silent in Switzerland: Joy discusses one of the most challenging parts of her story.

Unicorn Monday Magic: Important discussions about why unicorns exist + Ryan Gosling

History Repeats Itself: How history can repeat itself in relationships (and history)

Nothing New Under the Pulpit: The posture of your heart can change how you hear.

It’s not that you’re not marriage material… but you smell like cabbage.: Dating rules learned at Pepperdine University

I blame communism…: How do our actions represent our Christian faith?

We no longer search for the news, the news finds us: Joy shares a short video discussing the impact of social media.

Breaking up with Jesus: How the words we use can shape our view of God.

Five Weddings and a Funeral: Similarities between weddings and funerals + a prayer

Attempted Attack Gone Awry: Joy discusses an attempted attack and the challenge of 1 Peter.

Ignorance: The state of being uneducated, unaware, or uninformed: Discussion on heart surgery and how to prepare for marriage

Jon Foreman: Learning How To Die: Joy discusses her love for these song lyrics.

Did Michael Jackson Feng Shui?: Joy discusses the brevity of life.

Unicorn Tears: Joy introduces her love of unicorns with a funny video.