Not too long ago I spoke at a university’s chapel. After the event finished, some of the students came up to talk with me. One guy very formally shook my hand and told me he was part of the “Entrepreneurial Club.” He looked at me with the intensity of a car salesman and told me I did “an excellent job.”
(The conversation went something like this…)
“Thank you. I appreciate that.”
“Have you ever considered doing something on your own?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, you mentioned working for your parents, but I think you have enough talent to go out on your own.”
(Laughing) “That’s very kind of you to say, but I enjoy working for my parents. That is the whole reason I do what I do, because I believe in their message and want to get it to our generation.”
“But wouldn’t you want to have your own thing?”
“No. I think it’s very healthy to have the covering of wise counsel over us, especially at a young age. I want them as my boss.”
“But you could be your own boss!”
“Get behind me, Satan!”
OK, I didn’t really say that last line—but it totally felt like he was trying to sell me some glorious life free of “the boss man.” Well, he was.
It was an honor to think that he thought I was talented, and I guess he was just trying to do his job as an entrepreneur scouting out his next “thing” or selling me a four-door sedan. But it got me thinking about what we value as the best position to be in—for our jobs or our personal lives.
I realize some of you have awful bosses, and some of you work for yourselves and it’s fantastic. I get that. But for me, my parents happen to be the wisest people I know and are simultaneously my bosses. By choosing to work for them I have entrusted them to oversee me in my work life.
Because I respect them so much I have also entrusted to have them oversee me in my personal life. Whether you work for yourself or not; whether you have good parents or not, do you have any overseers in your personal life?
In our generation today, one of the biggest problems I see is the conflict between autonomy and authority. It’s no mystery that we live in a generation in which most of us are free to pick up and move and live independently of our parents. To actually have authority figures in our lives is something we would have to seek out—unless, of course, you were assigned your most recent parole officer.
I believe we have glorified independence as if we believe it is the best and wisest way to live. I’m not saying that we all need to run to Mommy and Daddy and have them tell us what to do, but I think we need to reevaluate why we think independence is so great. Especially if you are someone in the camp who constantly talks about our need for “community.”
Don’t give me “community” talk if that means having peers to hang out with on Friday night. That’s not community, that’s comfort. Community, as I have heard it defined in recent years, is doing life with people. I think it means we mutually learn from one another, accept our differences, seek out people who have gone before us, (aka “old folks”) and humbly submit to some level of authority.
Having overseers doesn’t mean we blindly follow anyone who is in AARP. My mother is almost 60 and would be the first to say she doesn’t have life figured out. But when it comes to finding some level of authority in our lives it might be good to ask ourselves:
1) Does Jesus value seeking wisdom?
2) Does Jesus command us to submit to authority?
3) Was Jesus under authority?
In my personal life when the focus becomes independence and not having anyone “speak boldly into my life,” growing and gaining wisdom are generally at a standstill. And, in those times I’ve had to ask myself, if I am not humble enough to come under the authority of any human being, what makes me think that I would be humble enough to come under the authority of God?
Matthew 4:8–11
“Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. And he said to him, “All these I will give you, if you will fall down and worship me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Be gone, Satan! For it is written, ‘You shall worship the Lord your God and him only shall you serve.’” Then the devil left him, and behold, angels came and were ministering to him.
1 Corinthians 1:25–31
For the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men. For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth. But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring nothing things that are, so that no human might boast in the presence of God.
2 Timothy 3:2
For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy…
1 Peter 2:13-17 (Message)
Make the Master proud of you by being good citizens. Respect the authorities, whatever their level; they are God’s emissaries for keeping order. It is God’s will that by doing good, you might cure the ignorance of the fools who think you’re a danger to society. Exercise your freedom by serving God, not by breaking the rules. Treat everyone you meet with dignity. Love your spiritual family. Revere God. Respect the government.
Love and Respect (Now) is a division of Love and Respect. Please be considerate.
From My Heart
All of the Love and Respect Now Posts…In One Place!
Emerson & Sarah Eggerichs on Marriage, Parenting, Family of Origin, Work & Death
Fighting for Love (and Other Potentially Hazardous Cliches)
One of the best ways to tempt someone is to appeal to their pride. I don’t know if the guy is sharp enough to know that but you sure sniffed it out.
Your words on being under authority and having overseers in your life are a great reminder too.
Sheryl – It’s not easy but I have learned the hard way…
John – Yeah, it definitely was a compliment, but then I realized it wasn’t a productive compliment for me.
I really like this post a lot. Learning how to live under authority can be a challenge for… uh… some of us. This is a solid reminder for those of us who like to try and be a spiritual John Wayne- that we can’t be self-reliant and tall in the saddle while honestly seeking after Christ.
Specifically, I LOVE your third question. Jesus is always subservient to the Father, he makes himself an obedient servant. He holds himself up as an example to us, to obey him like he obeys the Father who sent him. But here’s something further to ponder: this petition to authority isn’t made on any basis of worth, or strength, or petition. Jesus isn’t worth less than the Father, he isn’t weaker than the Father, and he certainly isn’t afraid of Him. Jesus is IN the Father, and the Father in him. Yet, even as he IS God, he makes himself a servant and obeys the authority of the Father. Why?
We often think of authority in the terms of the World. The weak submit to the authority of the strong because they are fearful, or they somehow hope to profit from it. It’s hard to imagine two people, equal by all measures and with nothing to gain, and one wholeheartedly submitting to the other’s authority. It rankles our sense of equality. Yet this is what Jesus does. And he does it out of Love. In John 14:15, Jesus tells his disciples that “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.” Not ‘if you fear me’ or ‘if I make you,’ but ‘if you love me.’ And later on in that same chapter he sets himself up as an example for this principle. “I do as the Father commanded me, so that the world may know that I love the Father.” (John 14:31)
Personally, I think that’s really powerful, the idea of obeying an authority out of love. As I hinted at, I’ve had a history of chafing under authority. I used to believe that obeying commands was a sign of weakness, and that it was an admirable thing to follow one’s own path. But when you stop viewing authority through the eyes of the world and look at it through the eyes of God, obedience stops becoming about force and coercion and starts becoming about a sincere desire to express love.
That’s the big point. That being said, I would also like to point out that, when it comes to EARTHLY authority, there’s a big difference between “respect” and “submission.” So I might change the wording of your second question to reflect that, depending on the situation. Like that verse in 1 Peter, for example. While we should always respect the authorities that have been placed over us, we shouldn’t allow ourselves to be doormats for unrighteousness. The Disciples ended up being executed as traitors and dissenters because they wouldn’t stop preaching Christ. They respected the government, they weren’t rebellious or lawless, but they wouldn’t always submit to it. They didn’t cave in their obedience to Divine Authority in order to submit to those Earthly Authorities. I just wanted to throw that out there because I know a lot of people who have struggled with those verses in that regard.
Sorry for hogging all your comment space. I like this post and your blog and you seem like a super nice person and God Bless. Huzzah.
Duke – To respond to your great thoughts in your second paragraph I would say I think it’s because Jesus realized there was freedom in obedience and submission – especially as he was embodied in a human form.
Your thoughts were excellent and you should probably write your own post about it! I liked your last point and agree with you. We obviously can’t take one verse on obeying authority and superseded other scripture that talks about obeying God over man. Our western minds want to take one verse as fact instead of looking at the big picture. This is why I love the struggle that Bonhoeffer went through…
Anyways, thanks for your comment!
Sheryl thinks...
I love this. Having people further down the road of life who can speak into our lives and give us guidance is crucially important—and biblical. Thanks for being a great role model.
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