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1) I associate Valentine’s Day more with candy and the colors pink and red than love.
2) I am amused by the very vocal, bitterly single people on Valentine’s Day. It secretly makes me chuckle because I want to say, “Hmmm…why do you think you are single?”
3) Maybe I lied about “secretly” chuckling since I just told the World Wide Webular.
4) I like red roses. Many women like to say they don’t, but when they get them, I think they secretly like them. No more secrets, please.
5) Why is there an unspoken rule that it’s sorta the man’s responsibility to plan unless otherwise noted? In Japan, women give gifts on February 14th, and men reciprocate on March 14th. Consumerism at its most equal.
6) It’s on a Monday this year. That can make office dynamics really fun to watch. I wish I didn’t work alone.
7) One Valentine’s Day I was working at a company that was 90% females. My boyfriend and I had just broken up the week before, but, as I said in point uno, Valentine’s Day is more about candy and pink than love. I was excited and dressed up in all pink and took heart-shaped cookies to work. If I recall correctly, most employees were wearing black and cold stares.
9) Maybe I wouldn’t like the holiday as much if my mom didn’t send me a package every single year. It’s a sugar and curly ribbon explosion. And when I crash from the sugar high, I crawl into the fetal position and start crying as I face the stark reality that I will be alone for the rest of my life.**
10) Sometimes simply numbering things is no longer enjoyable for me. Or stopping at ten.
11) There was one Valentine’s Day that caused me a lot of agony. Second grade, Mr. Berry’s class. It was my first year in “real” school after having been homeschooled with other really cool homeschoolers. Mr. B. instructed us to have valentines to give each classmate. I can vividly remember being in my parents’ basement the night before in agony over which valentine to give Ryan Hosler. I wanted one that wouldn’t give away the fact that I was in love with him, but wasn’t too casual and said “You are neat.” It was a fine line.
Ryan: I don’t remember which one I picked for you (feel free to let me know if you have it framed somewhere in your room), but I figured now, on Valentine’s Day 2011, I can tell you that I had romantic feelings for you as a seven year old. You ruined my Valentine’s Day 1990 due to my stomach being in knots. But it’s OK, because it was all done in the name of love.
* No, this is not a disease. It stands for “What Would St. Valentine Do?” If you forget to plan anything for your special Snookleberry pie or the plans just fall apart, you can say to your Pookie, “W.W.S.V.D?” Then you both would remember that he was beheaded for trying to tell people about the love of Jesus and that would make missing your dinner reservations not seem so bad.
** Inserted for humor’s sake. I am not bitter, nor do I cry…very often.
Love and Respect (Now) is a division of Love and Respect. Please be considerate.