Yes you read that correctly. Part 1 of 15.
Most of these videos are going to be short and sweet. The first ten videos will be Ask Joy Q&A on the topic of respect. The final five videos will give us insight into the topic of respect from six men who listened to the Ask Joy responses live.
Why?
If you didn’t know, I work for my parents’ marriage ministry called Love and Respect based on the Bible verse in Ephesians 5:33. We believe that men and women BOTH need Love and Respect, but especially in relationship and conflict, men and women often process through different filters. It seems to me that Scripture is God’s gift to us as we navigate His unique designs.
Read more on that here.
Culturally, we hear less about respect in relationship. I have had a number of women write in to ask what this looks like and how one should show or “put on” respect toward the men in their lives.
This series will answer a handful of those inquiries…
Respectfully,
Joy
How do you view respect?
P.S. From here on out the Respect State of the Union will be known as RSOTU. (I’m looking for ways to shorten my work day and this cuts out the typing of 17 characters.)
P.S.S. Confused by the statement I make about no one teaching me how to treat men growing up? Read my comment to “Erin” in the below comment section. Even my Father will say in his years of counseling as a pastor he missed what scripture had to say about Respect.
Love and Respect (Now) is a division of Love and Respect. Please be considerate.
From My Heart
All of the Love and Respect Now Posts…In One Place!
Emerson & Sarah Eggerichs on Marriage, Parenting, Family of Origin, Work & Death
Fighting for Love (and Other Potentially Hazardous Cliches)
pkphinfan – You are welcome. I think it’s going to be interesting as well. Hopefully it will get some discussions going. No vacation here! (-:
That video is so tantalizing. I like the point you made, Joy, about never being sat down and told how to respect men well, it’s all been trial and error up until now. I long to know what that looks like. I feel like you and your creative team read my mind. So excited for this video series!
Erin – Thank you for using the word tantalizing. (-: It’s funny, one of the comments the guys made off camera was in response to my statement about not being taught. He was like, “Your dad wrote the book! How were you not taught?” My dad didn’t write the book until I finished college…and then I struggled with the message for a number of years. Culturally this is something that women have not been taught – so I feel like we are all a little behind the eight ball on this. I can’t wait for your insightful comments on EVERY SINGLE VIDEO.
Your hair looks really clean in that video. 😉
I always struggled with the word respect until I heard your dad speak on it. Then it all made sense. So glad you are breaking down how I act respectful. Just please don’t tell me it means I have to “sweet.”
You are smart. And pretty. And doing a good thing here.
Lindsey – You just wait. I just saw the footage from my shoot last week…and let’s just say my hair isn’t so silky smooth.
Sweet? C’mon you know me – I tell people I am going to punch them in the throat on a regular basis. It’s more the fact that we become disrespectful when we have been hurt or feel we have a right to – and I don’t think that’s effective communication. You can be a strong, direct and an empowered woman – who doesn’t stoop to disrespect. However, I fail often.
Thanks for your words!
OK…your video #1 got my attention. I was married for 6 years, divorced for 33 and have been in a 3 year relationship with a man and we constantly struggle with the “R” word, so you’ve got one eager listener waiting for your next flick.
Joy, I like your format on this topic already! How do I view “respect’? Like sex and intimacy, it’s a learned behavior. I did not grow up with it as a priority or regular discussion. I grew up in an all female house-mom divorced when I was 4 (probably lack of respect was an issue-which led to infidelity and unforgiveness). While we are capable of being respectful we need training in it for sure-it does not come naturally to me. I have heard it’s a very important cultural quality in Japan and martial arts which attracts a lot of men. Please I’m asking the men how honor and respect are different but am thinking they are siblings of the same family. The only place I keep running into this word is in the Christian community and in God’s Word (22 times in NKJV). Wish there was a whole Chapter in the Bible about respect like there is Love 1 Cointhians 13. I’m thinking God tied respect into His agape love though. When I asked my husband for a symbol of what respect looks like to him he gave me: hands open, palms up with the gesture of “How can I help u”. This help me understand what respect looked like to him. Made me think of Jesus on the cross too -open hands saving! Definitely I’m open for more good instruction in this area and ready to build with the men’s input! I am the only pink in a house of blue..I really want to get this down sooner than later. 1st lesson already received: Introduce your guest by name! Got it!
Read your Dad’s article…after I posted…(opps working on more listening before I speak) it help to clarify some questions for me!;-)
Great Info – love your dad’s books! … Just a little niggle … if your parents have been teaching this for so many years … how come they’ve never taught you anything about “how to treat/respect a man” ? Personally, I wish that I’d known this 20 yrs ago – it may have saved my marriage.
I’m in a NEW relationship now, & we’re both studying this info, learning together – Great Work – THanks Again xx
Leo – check out my comment to Erin below for the answer to your “niggle”. (-:
Your comment of wishing you would have known this 20 years ago is the very comment I heard over & over at the L&R conferences & is why I am doing this. Love and Respect NOW. Thanks for stopping by the site!
pkphinfan thinks...
Thanks for doing this series. Should be interesting.
Happy vacation?
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