I love discussing things with my Dad. If it wasn’t for our unbelievable ability to tap dance, we would probably opt to do a Daddy-Daughter-Discussion at my wedding in place of the Daddy-Daughter-Dance.
Thankfully that decision doesn’t have to be made just yet. However, as you may have seen the past two weeks…I was not the most Anderson Cooper-esque in my interviews…so on the same day my father helped me out with a couple “Ask Joy” responses, he decided to flip the tables and interview me.
What you see below was our conversation. Simply our thoughts on the past weekend’s event, where I had spoken with a group of women on the topic of respect, and how we can empower ourselves by showing it to men instead of fearing the word.
Grab a cup of coffee…it’s almost 10 minutes long. Just pretend you are over at our house and sitting with us in the living room. Wait, first of all…this isn’t our living room. And second of all, I don’t even know you, so the fact that you are in my living room is really creeping me out!
Love and Respect (Now) is a division of Love and Respect. Please be considerate.
From My Heart
All of the Love and Respect Now Posts…In One Place!
Emerson & Sarah Eggerichs on Marriage, Parenting, Family of Origin, Work & Death
Fighting for Love (and Other Potentially Hazardous Cliches)
Joy-
These discussions are great! How blessed you are to be learning all these important points from your own father. We saw your parents last weekend in Cincinnati at our home church and can’t wait to attend the conference in a few weeks. Hope you are doing well- you look like you’re in your true element. Keep up the great work on your blog!
Love,
Cara Kuester (Carlson)
Lisbeth – Thank YOU!
Cara – Thanks so much – great to hear from you. I was listening to my friend play the piano the other day and started regretting not sticking with your mothers lessons!! (-:
Respecting Men is something I’m not always good at, so this is a pretty good reminder for me. I’ve had a string of bad experiences where i’ve been hurt physically or emotionally, and I sometimes will project that on to other men. I have no idea how i stopped hating men long enough to fall in love, have a relationship and get married. I will try extra hard to show respect to my husband, but with other men, like my friend’s boyfriends, or my husbands friends, and I disappoint myself so much at times at how disrespectful I can be. I need to remember what you said, that nothing the other person has done gives me the right to be like that.
Thanks for sharing this video
I LOVED how you emphasized that the demonstration of respect is simultaneously a demonstration of power. It’s so counter-intuitive to the world to say that there is power in service, but when wives (and people in general), make an intentional effort to be respectful in serving, they are mimicking Jesus himself, washing his disciples feet. If that’s what our Savior did, then there is no threat of a loss of dignity when we make an effort to show respect to others, and our husbands in particular.
Jesus described himself as meek and said that the meek will inherit the earth. Respectful wives are an excellent example of meekness (as opposed to weakness). Meekness is power in service; power in check. Weakness is a lack of control over your own body and spirit.
Thanks for the encouragement, friend!
Mary – Thank you for being open about your pain. I too know exactly what you mean about projecting past hurts and injustice onto other men. It’s not fair to them and it’s not allowing healing and redemption in our own life.
It’s also understandable to be protective of your friends. (which I address here: https://www.loveandrespectnow.com/index.php?s=jerk)
I believe the Lord allowed you to stop hating men long enough to get married because he probably brought some healing to you through your husband-correct? But ultimately you had to decide if you would let the Lord do that in your life—so give yourself some credit!
And as Val so well said, “When wives (and people in general), make an intentional effort to be respectful in serving, they are mimicking Jesus himself.”
None of us really deserve respect – but we are also all made in the image of God and children of God. We have needs and the only way to motivate a person to change will be by meeting those needs. Obviously there are healthy boundaries when abuse or safety are an issue, but my observation is that we are withholding respect from people made in God’s image out of fear more than anything else.
Fear is not from God.
Val – As always your insights are profound. You should write a post on the word meek. I think that word gets a bad rap and would love to know your thoughts. Thank you.
Really love this one…and
Val’s comment as well, great Biblical example. Joy is right about you blogging about the word meek, as I was reading Val’s comment I was thinking she would be another great blog to follow.
I would love to hear more of the scriptures and examples you used in your conference. Thanks for sound and level headed advice.
Great job Joy! I love how you talk about the fact that nothing that folks can do to you change how you will react to them… great!
What an empowering message. I love when you talk about be a strong woman, but how showing respect to men does not diminish that.
I cant wait to see you talk in person. Come to Nashville soon!
@Stephanie Newton, I just came across this post searching for something and saw your comment. I am coming to Belmont University in January. I’ll be there soon. If you can double as a college student, I’d love to have you come.
@JOY, yea! @andrealucado and I will try to find a way in!
Lisbeth Rhodes thinks...
These video conversations with your dad are fantastic! Thank you!!!!
| at |