Hey Joy,
There’s this woman I am attracted to, but after I kissed her I wasn’t feelin’ it at all anymore. Is chemistry outside of chemistry class real, or is it all in my head?
-Taylor
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Yep! It’s real.
But just because chemistry is real does not mean it’s the only thing to factor–if this woman is quality, give it a second and see if Chemistry eventually sparks.
Sweet scents and physical attraction matters, so don’t beat yourself up if they never ignite, but also remember that those lovin’ feelings shouldn’t be the only thing to make or break your marriage down the road. (More on this in the next video post…It’s Chemistry Class all week, folks!)
Oh, and chemistry is also God’s way of making sure you don’t date your sister. WHA?!?!
That and more of my weird theories on scents and birth control in the video below…
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From my chem-class-lovin’ heart,
Joy
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Hi Jamie,
Well I wrote them about 5 years ago and they are all private. My conclusions were again theories based on a number of articles and different things I had looked into, but if you email me through the site I will work on sending you the private blog posts that I wrote. (-: If you dive into research about scents and attraction and then look into how birth control changes some of those things, it’s just kind of easy to draw that conclusion. And since I often hear women who go on/off birth control having an impact to their sex drive, it’s just obviously something we should pay attention to… Ya know? A great book I love is called, “Taking Charge of Your Fertility.” There are some really interesting insights in that book. Call me a hippie but I think there is something very valid about thinking through what kind of pills we put in our body!
I have a huge amount of chemistry with one of my friends, and we tried dating for a couple of months, but just didn’t work as a couple. But I feel this magnetism toward him that’s hard to ignore. I’m not sure if he feels it too. Communication was one of our downfalls for why we didn’t work out. :p
Ahhh! Such a bummer. Sometimes communication is as simple as you two just being different, not necessarily wrong in how you communicate. Hate to be a pusher, but read my dad’s book Love and Respect and see if some of the “miscommunication” was a result of just being two different people!
This is good stuff. Also, what you said about birth control is real life. Stuff like that totally affects you way more than you realize! I highly encourage researching and informing yourself about how changing your hormonal makeup can affect your sexual desires. You speak so much truth Joy!
Thanks Julie! Have you read the book I recommended above to Jamie? Taking Control of Your Fertility?? So good.
It’s sitting beside my bed. It has been super helpful! 🙂
I don’t know why my name didn’t show up with that comment, but it’s Julie that has that book beside her bed 😉
I appreciate your honesty in admitting who you are…
This was great, Joy; really helpful. These kinds of situations are so frustrating because they’re so seemingly irrational, they make me feel like a crazy person.
Thanks Nea! It’s hard to not beat yourself up when someone seems so great. It’s that fine line of giving something time and then just being realistic…that they might be your long lost cousin. Haha. xo
Ok. I took notes:
1. “don’t date your sister.”
2. “don’t kiss your sister.”
Got it.
Seriously though, very good, very helpful thoughts! Thanks for your being real and thorough on a topic some people might dismiss. And your mumu rocks.
Thanks Jeff! I have a plethora of them. And you pretty much got all you needed to know in points 1&2. Follow that and you’ll be golden. Well, maybe point 3 which is “no cousins”.
Jamie thinks...
Joy, I would be REALLY interested in reading an article you referred to about birth control affecting desire for sex!! Any way I can get ahold of that?? Thanks!!
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