On Monday and Tuesday I answered two Ask Joys pertaining to why men lust and why women aren’t as attracted to the male body.

Many women seemed pleased with my acknowledgment that yes, we women are sexual beings, and yes, we do notice a hot man. Others felt that I might be implying that it is OK for women to lust over men.

I wanted to be clear about my personal beliefs. You are FREE to believe something else, but this is what I have come to conclude from my personal research and experience.

I believe men and women are both equally sexual but are stimulated differently.

A simple observation is the placement of our male and female anatomy and its ability to be stimulated. Wouldn’t you agree that one is a bit more accessible? I haven’t talked to too many girls who were scared to get called up in 7^th grade math class for fear of bringing more than just the answer to the chalkboard. Guys?

Every guy I’ve spoken to about it admits it was his worst nightmare.

God designed males and females differently. Disagree? Take your pants off. Because of these differences and more we will have…

a) different triggers for being aroused.

b) seasons for being more aroused and seasons for being less aroused.

c) susceptibility to outside contributing factors that can make us more or less “in the mood,” such as medications, stress, abuse, etc.

One woman commented that she LOVES to see her husband when he steps out of the shower. This was in response to my father’s statement in his book Love and Respect that when a wife gets out of the shower, the husband is often enamored. When a husband gets out of the shower, the wife says, “Put a towel around you; you’re getting water everywhere.”

My father’s example is based on Proverbs 5:19. It is partially meant to highlight male and female differences but also to highlight the multifaceted brain of the female (noticing more than just the male anatomy) and the male’s sole focus on his wife’s chestal region.

I am pumped for this wife that she gets excited about her husband, and I believe many women would agree with her. But what I believe is that there may be male and female differences when you subtract this woman’s marital bond with her husband.

It’s just a hunch, but if a woman saw ten different naked men, I believe she would feel less temptation for the act of sex than if a man saw ten different naked women.

Testosterone is a huge driving force in quick sexual arousal, and, on the whole, men around the world have higher levels of this chemical compared with women.  In the womb, this higher level of testosterone is what helps make the fetus male. Some women have higher (than the average female) levels of testosterone in their bodies. Guess what? They are usually more sexually aggressive compared with other females. The higher the level of testosterone, the higher the interest in casual sex.

I am not saying that because men have high levels of testosterone they are only interested in casual sex. Don’t read into that. Sex can become casual and free of intimacy for both of us, but how it gets to that point is through different hijackings and perversions of our most intimate design.

How are we hijacked?

I’ll tell you tomorrow…

If this topic interests you here are a couple reads:

Taking Sex Differences Seriously by Steven E. Rhoads

The Female Brain by Louann Brisendine