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SIDE NOTE: I am starting to re-think these whole “Ask Joy” videos….because… 1) I am running out of different places to sit in my office for the recordings. 2) I never came up with a good “sign off.” (Trust me, “Abschied meiner kleinen Freunde im Ausland!” just didn’t work.) 3) I realized hearing a short question is not how I am wired to respond. I always want to know more. I keep feeling like I am giving a million caveats of “I don’t really know the whole story.” …
I wasn’t going to post this “Ask Joy” response because I was really tired when I recorded it and I hope whoever asked the question doesn’t feel like I am un-empathetic…it’s just those lazy eyes that kick in when I am fatigued.
I promise.
Trying everything in my power to not laugh for this one.
Bless you boy…wherever and whoever you are. I appreciate your boldness and honest feelings in asking this question. We just happen to differ.
Oh, and I am a woman…just in case that wasn’t clear. Read more
From a single Mom: “Can men see me for who I really am, or are they always going to see me as “mommy me?”
I don’t know how Google searches for things so well, but since I have given my posts a lot of weird titles over the years, finding things by topic is like searching for Waldo in a candy cane store.
So, I wanted to put all the posts in one, easy-to-find place. Read more
What do you think about cliché phrases like, “Don’t marry the person you can live with; only marry the person you can’t live without?”
-Lauren
_______
Lauren,
I think we need to stop and pay attention to the reasons why we use phrases like this. Sometimes we they resonate with us so deeply because…they’re true! Read more
Hey Friendlings,
I absolutely love interviewing people, uncovering their stories, and getting so excited about the interview that I forget there are other people listening in on the conversation.
Join me as I uncover an incredible love story of basketball, broken dreams, romance and waiting.
Hey Friends,
I didn’t have time to make a trailer for this documentary, so for the full effect, turn on some dramatic movie music and read these quotes:
“Our real dating lives are OVER now!” – Laura
“I got matched with a guy who said he was 25. I’m pretty sure he’s 11.” – Joy Read more
(Note: If you miss Saved By The Bell, then you’re going to want to watch this video for nostalgia’s sake.)
Joy,
I’ve never had a girlfriend, but I am looking for one. I’ve tried online dating and I went out with two girls, but both said it wasn’t a really good match.
I am afraid that I am running out of time. I don’t want to be that guy who is 35 and has no one. Read more
You didn’t know I spoke German, did you? Yes, I took two long years of it in high school and my last name is German, loud and proud. If you didn’t know, “Was ist das?” translates to “What is that?”
And “eins, zwei, drei” is “one, two, three.” But now we are totally getting off topic. Read more
Want to laugh and be inspired today? Please meet two of my favorite people in the universe.
They’ll teach you about the beauty of miscommunication in dating, the making of a marriage in which one spouse often leaves the country, and why they let their unmarried friends be all up in their bizzzz-nass. Oh, and they’ll teach you about their actual business practices, social passions and facial-manicuring tricks. Read more
Do you like love stories? Do you like hip-hop? Do you like poetry and spoken word? Have you ever worked with your spouse? Have you ever wanted to move out of the friend-zone and into dating? Have you ever wanted to learn how to drop a mic? Read more
I have been married for three months now. My husband is very clean and I am fairly neat, but since being married I have kind of chilled out in that area. In fact, compared to my husband, I am lazy.
What can I do? I don’t want to make him feel like he got cheated by marrying me. Read more
Why is there so much violence in the Old Testament? How could a loving God allow _______? Isn’t it arrogant to believe Jesus is the only way to God?
How do the above questions pertain to a website about relationships, Joy? Read more
Joy,
I am twenty-one years old and I have been with my boyfriend since high school. Everyone says we are great together and affirms our relationship. We’re in college and have no debt–but I keep hearing statistics that younger couples getting married is not a recipe for success. Read more
I’m going to answer this question line by line. So if you want to get the gist of her question, then read all the non-bolded lines first. It’s a game for your eyeballs. You’re welcome.
First order of Biz: Men, I would LOVE for you to say what you think this man might be thinking from your perspective. And I would also say to you men, if you find yourself doing something similar to the dude she describes, I just want to let you in on a little secret.. Read more
THE 50% DIVORCE STATISTIC IS FALSE, FOLKS!!!
I don’t usually demand things, but I’m going to today. You must read Shaunti’s book or watch this interview I did with her. I’m literally telling everyone about her findings because it’s EXACTLY what my generation needs to hear. Read more
Researchers at MIT have begun seeing noticeable trends in society that mimic the impact of racial segregation in our communities. This Boston Globe article examines and discusses the scientific and historical side of what age segregation has been like in America. Inspired by this, I decided to do a little video to share my thoughts, as well as share some things that defined me as a child and now as an adult.
Storybooks and Hot Sauce. Read more
One of the most common phrases I’ve written in response to the Ask Joy emails I’ve received over the years is, “God is not trying to trick you.” I believe this old post–which I’ve updated for today–is an example of what triggers this type of question. But it also gets at the deeper issue we all need to face when we’re left wondering if we’ve misunderstood “God’s leading” in our life.
We may even wonder, “God, did you lie to me? Do you even care?”
This is the third time Mr. Timothy Willard has guest posted on the ol’ LRN site. He’s pretty much the male-Joy at this point, which is a title he’s been working toward for the past few years. (Bows head to be Knighted.)
In reality, I keep asking him back because I know him, respect him and appreciate his wisdom as a married man who can shed light on an area that, well, I cannot.
Hey Joy,
There’s this woman I am attracted to, but after I kissed her I wasn’t feelin’ it at all anymore. Is chemistry outside of chemistry class real, or is it all in my head? Read more
Hey Joy,
My husband and I just heard the Love and Respect message. Now, whenever we get into conflict, he shuts me down by saying, “You’re being disrespectful.”
How am I supposed to bring something up to him if this is always his response to conflict?
Read more
The people I know who are well-liked and have lots of friends are people who ask genuine questions of the people they meet. Sadly, some of us are a tad socially awkward and the thought of asking questions makes us want to hurl.
One day this woman will write a whole book about her life. You have NO IDEA how crazy and intense her upbringing was–and you wouldn’t know that if you met her, because her past is not her focus.
She has every right to be angry at God and at this world, and yet she isn’t.
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