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Recent Articles

5

The Illumination Project: All Your Questions, ANSWERED (maybe)

russ6

A woman who has known me since I was 5 years old and practically my second mother—not to mention the C.O.O of Love & Respect—didn’t fully grasp The Illumination Project until she recently watched it from beginning to end. I’m going to share the email she wrote to the whole Love and Respect (aka Mothership) staff at the end of this little post, but her response got me thinking that maybe some of you are confused, too.

Read more

8

What I Know Now: New Moms, Lessons From a Fifth Grader

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Hey friendlings,

We’ve finally come to the finish line of the What I Know Now series, a collection of little videos I made with my parents in celebration of The Illumination Project launch. My mom and pop have been sharing some nuggets of wisdom they’ve learned from different stages of their lives.

Read more

20

What I Know Now: New Dads, Put Pegs in the Floor

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In case you’re just joining us, we’re in the last leg of the What I Know Now series.

As The Illumination Project (a 6-week study) was released this month, one of the main points I try to drive home is for all of us to seek wise counsel. So this series is another example of doing that—I ask my parents to share what they would tell themselves at different life stages. We’ve heard some great stories from when they were single and when they were newlyweds and now…

…when they became my parents. (AKA, the best years of their lives)

Read more

3

What I Know Now: Newly Married Ladies and Joy’s Response to Sad Stories

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In case you’re just tuning in, we’re smack dab in the middle of the What I Know Now series. My hope for all these parental interviews is to highlight the importance of asking questions and seeking counsel—we have so much to learn from those who’ve gone before us.

Think of it as an echo of The Illumination Project song, an opening band to the main show, a slice of apple pie before the main course.

Read more

2

What I Know Now: Newly Married Men and Déjà Vu Conversations

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Friendlings, if you’ve been around the site for the past week, you should know two things:

1. The Illumination Project has launched! My baby, born!

2. We are smack dab in the middle of the What I Know Now series, starring none other than my wonderful (and often hilarious) parentals.

Read more

7

What I Know Now: Single Ladies, You Don’t Have to Marry Them!

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In light of one of the themes behind The Illumination Project—the importance of seeking counsel—I’ve brought in the ‘rents to talk all things wisdom.

They are, after all, older and wiser.

Over the next few weeks, I’ll be sharing some interviews I did with my mom and pop about what they would tell themselves at different stages of their lives—as singles, as newlyweds, as new parents.

Read more

3

What I Know Now: Single Men, Keep Your Shirts On

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Did you hear the good news?! The Illumination Project has officially launched! Don’t know what I’m talking about?! You may be living under a rock!

Lucky for you, the party is just getting started and even rock-dwellers are welcome.

Read more

4

Ask Joy: Confronting Parents—Yay or Nay?

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Question

Lately my siblings and I have really been feeling neglected and unloved by our parents. When we’ve asked other people whether or not to confront them about it, everyone has said, “No. You have to honor your parents.”

Can you confront your parents? Read more

0

Illumination Guest: Karyn Thurston – Finding Your Light

Photo Credit: Nate Grubbs

Hey friendlings,

I’m really excited to share some words with you from my dear friend, Karyn. She worked at Imago Dei in Portland, and was one of the contributors at The Illumination Project filming last summer. Karyn wrote this piece about light for my church a while back—I hope it brings some illumination to your day as well. Read more

9

Got Nerves? The Psychology Behind Those First-date Jitters

Did you know that there’s a resource page on this here thing?? Well there is, and guess what? I like hearing from YOU…

This was submitted and I thought it was worth sharing—those of you who are dating can take stock of what’s going on in the brain train (and laugh at themselves), and you married folk can reminisce and remember what it was like when they hid knives behind their backs on the first date…

Read more

1

Ask Joy: Paralyzed by Parents’ Divorce

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Question

I’m writing on behalf of my sister. She’s been in a serious relationship for about a year, but she’s paralyzed by the fear of getting married as a result of growing up in a divorced home. What can I say to my sister to calm her down and help her overcome her anxiety?

Read more

0

Illumination Guest: Diane Paddison – When God Turns on the Light

Photo credit: Nate Grubbs

I was standing in line at the Portland Nursery in an attempt to plant a garden with my friends Lindsay and Julie. (And no, the garden was not a success—but we did find what appeared to be the bones of a cat when we were “tilling the soil.”)

Anywhooo… the man behind in line me asked me about the college sweatshirt I was wearing. One thing led to another and he said, “You have to meet me wife.”

Read more

0

Ask Joy: Which Comes First, Love or Respect?

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Question

Which should come first, love or respect?

Read more

1

Illumination Guest: Sarah Collins – A Fortress for Love

alhambra

I’m excited for you to consume the following words and pictures from my sweet friend, Sarah. There are few settings in life where I am forced to contemplate life more than when traveling solo. I love the insights Sarah stumbled upon when she stepped foot into Spain.

Anybody up for a trip?

Read more

1

RSOTU: Fear Impacting Respect

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A lot of you are just joining Love and Respect Now for the first time. To which I say, welcome! And also, I hope you like unicorns.

Even if you’re not new, I thought we would do a little flashback in case you missed this series I did answering questions on the topic of respect. This particular question deals with fearing the word respect—the series continues on to eventually be a conversation between me and a group of dudes talking…and not talking…for hours. (Name that movie.)

Read more

12

Formal Lunch: The Name’s Bond, James Bond.

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Recently I was on Facebook and saw this post from my friend, Annie. It was the opposite of many people’s typical pet-peeve status updates.

Read more

2

Intimately Known

Photo Credit: Branden Harvey

The only people I know who don’t want to be intimately known are those who have been deeply hurt.

The fear of being exposed or hurt again keeps us private. And while being known by our fellow man is scary enough, it’s sometimes even harder to believe that there is a God who knows us, loves us, and is good.

Read more

0

Illumination Guest: Timothy Willard – Naked I Jump

Photo Credit: Nate Grubbs

My friend, Esther, introduced me to Tim a couple years ago. Not hearing my name correctly, Tim tried to clear it up by guessing what he thought he heard Esther say.

Tim: “Chalet?”

Me: “What? No…Joy.”

Read more

6

Joy & Steph: Album 2.0

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Hi Friends and lovers of music,

It is with a sad heart that I let you all know that Stephanie, my partner-in-crime and other half will be ending her 2 1/2 years with LRN to start a new season staying at home with her babies.

I am 110% behind her doing this, but 110% sad that I will now be alone in the office staring at the wall.

Read more

8

Ask Joy: Single and (Not) Ready to Mingle

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Question

Joy,

I used to be on pins and needles waiting to get married. Every interaction I had with a single person was weighted with, “Is this the ONE?” 

But now it’s changed. Read more

10

The Illumination Project: Pre-Order Party!

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Well Hello!

IT’S FINALLY HERE. The (almost) birthday of The Illumination Project.

They grow up so fast.

Read more

5

Ask Joy: Fear and the Tick, Tock of my Girlfriend’s Baby Clock

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 Ask Joy

I just started dating this wonderful woman—I really care about her, and love the heart she has for having a family someday. Problem is, we just started dating, and because I have to travel a lot for my career, I just left the country for a couple of months.

Read more

30

Joy Asks Rick…and a GIVEAWAY.

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Hey! My pastor, Rick McKinley, is re-releasing his first book. And since I office out of my church and am close enough to steal a few copies, I did just that…for YOU!

You’re welcome.

Read more

9

Ask Joy: Does Newly Married = No More Friends?

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Ask Joy

Hi Joy,

I’ve recently gotten married. I love being married, but now my single friends are leaving me out. My best friend, for example, no longer calls when she goes camping or to a concert. 

I know I can’t go out as much as my “free-wheeling” single friends, as I’m balancing school and my husband, but I don’t want to feel like there’s this divide growing between us.

Read more

10

C.S. Lewis – The Thrill

Photo Credit: Nate Grubbs

About two years ago, I posted some thoughts on the timeless C.S. “Jack” Lewis and his words regarding love and marriage.

I loved the insight and discussion that ensued, and I want to get that going again, so I decided to repost this little gem.

Read more

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