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Recent Articles

6

RSOTU: Is Respect Giving In? (Pt. 8 of 15)

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Respect State of The Union Watch the intro to find out what this is all about: RSOTU Intro (1 of 15) Questions If you think a man is acting childish, is it possible that he feels like you are treating him like a child? In relationship, how would you recommend treating each other with respect and communicating with respect even when it doesn’t seem fair? How do you humbly confront childish behavior without being patronizing?

7

RSOTU: Practical Ways To Show Respect (Pt. 7 of 15)

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Respect State of The Union Watch the intro to find out what this is all about: RSOTU Intro (1 of 15) Question: Guys – How do you feel honored or respected by men or women? Women – Have you ever asked a guy what makes him feel honored or respected? Disrespected?

12

RSOTU: Respectfully Decline Date (Pt. 6 of 15)

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Respect State of The Union Watch the intro to find out what this is all about: RSOTU Intro (1 of 15) Questions How have you turned someone down? Why didn’t you give them a chance? How have you been turned down? Did you feel like they gave you a chance?

6

RSOTU: Respect Unkind Words (Pt. 5 of 15)

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  Respect State of The Union Watch the intro to find out what this is all about: RSOTU Intro (1 of 15)   Let me be clear. Respect does not mean foolishly staying in an unhealthy relationship. However, there are wise and respectful ways to remove oneself from an unhealthy situation or confront a hurtful miscommunication.     Questions Have your insecurities ever caused you to misinterpret someone’s statement? How did you respond?  

8

RSOTU: Respect When We Don’t Feel Loved (Pt. 4 of 15)

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  Respect State of The Union Watch the intro to find out what this is all about: RSOTU Intro (1 of 15)     Question Have you ever made the mistake of making a global issue out of a situation that simply needed clarification?

11

RSOTU: Social Cues for Showing Respect (3 of 15)

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Respect State of The Union Watch the intro to find out what this is all about: RSOTU Intro (1 of 15) Questions Men: How were you taught as a kid to treat women? Women: How were you taught as a kid to treat men?

9

RSOTU: Fear Impacting Respect (Pt. 2 of 15)

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  Respect State of The Union Watch the intro to find out what this is all about: RSOTU Intro (1 of 15) Questions How do you think fear impacts relationships? Is there a solution? Do you fear the word respect?  

30

Respect State of The Union: Intro (Pt. 1 of 15)

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Yes you read that correctly. Part 1 of 15. Most of these videos are going to be short and sweet.  The first ten videos will be Ask Joy Q&A on the topic of respect.  The final five videos will give us insight into the topic of respect from six men who listened to the Ask Joy responses live. Why? If you didn’t know, I work for my parents’ marriage ministry called Love and Respect based on the Bible verse in Ephesians 5:33.  We believe that men and …

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15

Ask Joy: ASKS YOU! Not Normal Ned

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Ask Joy Is it normal that I am _____ years old, and never dated? My Response “Normal” is subjective. Maybe you’ve: 1) Never dated. 2) Haven’t dated in ten years. 3) Your only date consisted of your cousin being forced to take you to your senior prom in your Uncle Fred’s mint Toyota Tercel. It’s normal to feel not normal. Especially when what we long for seems to be magnified in everyone else’s life.  When you desire to be in relationship, EVERYONE is in relationship. Even the …

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6

Ask Joy: Shuttin’ Sexuality Down

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Ask Joy Can you be sexual without having sex? I mean, as a single twentysomething Christian, how can one abstain from sex but still not completely shut down their sexuality? Any thoughts? Thanks! My Response Yes! We are sexual beings through and through. Our sexuality must be more than just sex, but it will look different for everyone. Abstaining should not mean denying how we were created. Once we can separate our sexuality from just sex, I think we are free to discuss this in …

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13

Ask Joy: God’s Symphony Gone Flat?

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Ask Joy What if you thought the guy was right and believed that God orchestrated the meeting? But he’s now walked away, after one-and-a-half years? My Response People have free will, which means we won’t always understand why they do what they do. Regarding God’s orchestration, the mystery becomes intertwined with our limited human understanding. It’s a deeper theological question of whether God dictates everything we do or whether He works in the midst of human beings and their choices, be they good or bad. People will …

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11

Stuff I Like: Strengths Finder Personality Profile

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As I said in the video, the worst thing you can do is put yourself in a box. Five years ago, my strengths were Activator, Relator, Command, Strategic, and Restorative. God designed us with certain strengths, but He doesn’t limit us. He created us with the ability to grow and evolve as transformative creatures in Christ. But I like this type of test because it helps me identify what I am bringing to the table when it comes to work, ministry, and relationships. My strengths as …

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9

Ask Joy: Fooled by Facebook

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Ask Joy How can I stop from getting emotionally attached to boys on Facebook? It has become a vicious cycle for me with different guys. Please help me! My Response First I want to honor you for being introspective and aware that this is happening to you.  My guess is you’re not alone, but most people aren’t intuitive enough to recognize. Well done. However, if you believe it’s unhealthy and “vicious,” I think most people would conclude you should shut down Facebook. Trust me, the …

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19

Ask Joy: Wedding? Why?

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Ask Joy Why do women want to get married? As a woman, I don’t grasp it myself and certainly could never see getting married before I’m 25 or how it would be important. My Response Guess what is so cool? You don’t have to get married! Just make sure you don’t make flippant comments without thinking about the repercussions of them. Men will hear your mantra of not wanting to get married, and if at age 25 you all of a sudden decide to change …

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23

The One: Part 3 – What If There’s No-One?

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Don’t shed a tear because it’s the final “Monday-One-Day”. You can always re-watch Parts 1 & 2 every single day until YouTube implodes. The One: Part 1 – “Is There Only One” The One: Part 2 – “How Do I Know?” In Part 3 I will tackle how I have felt called to respond when it feels like there is NO-one. So what do you think?

9

Do Age Differences Matter? Ask Joy

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Ask Joy If I am 23, how old is too old for the person I am dating in your opinion? My Response 93. You want them to at least remember who you are. Obviously there are different factors that come into play if you are coming from different generations. But if the person you want to date is older or younger, the bigger questions to ask are: Do the wise people around me say we are a good match? Do they support our relationship? If …

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10

Stuff I Like: Little Ceasars Commercial

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Three things may have contributed to my inability to find my favorite commercial of all time. 1) I am terrible at Google searches. 2) I don’t know how to spell Cezar? Ceasar? Cesar? Czar of Russia? 3) I give up on Google searches after one try. In this case, #3 isn’t true. I have actually searched for this 30 second spot of sheer genius multiple times. I mentioned it in my most recent video and the desire to see it led me to challenge my …

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21

The One: Part 2 – “How Do I Know?”

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It’s another “Monday-One-Day” and if you missed The One: Part 1 – “Is There Only One” make sure to check it out. In today’s video there is a little less wind machine and a little more male vocals.  Yes, I am an alto by birth. So, what do you think? P.S. Post I referenced in the video: Can Anxious Andy Commit? WATCH: Part 3: What if there is NO one?

9

Ask Joy: Twitter Answer

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Some of you ask me questions that I feel I can answer in 140 characters or less. Yes, I value your questions that much. Truly, I do wish I could sit with you face-to-face and answer your questions—no matter how weird they (or you) are. Since I can’t, Twitter allows me to answer some in a quick way that might give you some direction, make you think, make you laugh, or make you want to send a bomb to my house. Please don’t. “But Joy, …

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15

Ask Joy: Getting Set Up On The Commune

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Ask Joy I’m turning 30 soon and I am single. All of my close relationships are with couples. Ideally I would love to be in a community where men and women, older and younger, married and single, connect. But because it seems as though my friends have just kind of accepted me as the single girl, no one seems interested or available to help connect me with any single men. Am I expecting too much from my close friends? My Response I admire that you …

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38

The One: Part 1 – “Is There Only One?”

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Many people (myself included) have asked, “Joy, what do you think about the one?” * Over the next three Mondays, or “Monday – One – Day” as I have been calling it in my head, I will post videos with my personal thoughts on the one. Part 1 – Is There Only One? Part 2 – How Do I Know? (If this is the one.) Part 3 – What If There Is No One? (Contrary to popular belief, we did not order wind machines for …

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22

Ask Joy: Lusting Larry, Fearful Fawn & J Crew Carl (Pt. 4)

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End of Part 3: …Sex can become casual and free of intimacy for both of us, but how it gets to that point is through different hijackings and perversions of our most intimate design. How are we hijacked? I’ll tell you tomorrow… * Part 4: I believe an understanding of our different designs can hijack sex… It’s my understanding that the visual environment we live in can be more of a temptation for men, and I want women to be aware and have compassion and …

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9

Ask Joy: Lusting Larry, Fearful Fawn & J Crew Carl (Pt. 3)

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On Monday and Tuesday I answered two Ask Joys pertaining to why men lust and why women aren’t as attracted to the male body. Many women seemed pleased with my acknowledgment that yes, we women are sexual beings, and yes, we do notice a hot man. Others felt that I might be implying that it is OK for women to lust over men. I wanted to be clear about my personal beliefs. You are FREE to believe something else, but this is what I have …

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15

Ask Joy: Lusting Larry, Fearful Fawn & J Crew Carl (Pt. 2)

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Yesterday a woman asked, “Why do men lust?” I let my father help tackle the question and he challenged the woman to look at the bigger picture by saying, “In the wisdom of God, all good things have the potential for a dark side.” He encouraged the woman to look at her own fears as a comparison. We asked her to trust God in the face of things that don’t always make sense to us — which is especially hard to do when it’s in …

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15

Ask Joy: Lusting Larry, Fearful Fawn & J Crew Carl (Pt. 1)

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Ask Joy Why did God create men to lust? I hate it that he has to “turn away.” I suppose it’s because I can’t understand it. I am completely fulfilled with my man. There is zero attraction for me when a hot guy hits on me. So my question is, why? Is there a purpose? I think if I understood it a bit more in a biblical sense, I wouldn’t find myself taking it so personally. My Response How many hot guys are hitting on …

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