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End of Part 3: …Sex can become casual and free of intimacy for both of us, but how it gets to that point is through different hijackings and perversions of our most intimate design. How are we hijacked? I’ll tell you tomorrow… * Part 4: I believe an understanding of our different designs can hijack sex… It’s my understanding that the visual environment we live in can be more of a temptation for men, and I want women to be aware and have compassion and …
Ask Joy What do you think about dating someone who doesn’t KNOW Jesus? My Response Like the background music on this video? The intro to all of my videos is by my friend Ragnar and the music played during my Ask Joy answer is by the super talented husband and wife duo, The Woodlands. So grateful for uber talented friends. 2012 Update: My friend Renea wrote a great post on the same topic…CLICK HERE
Part one of this five-part series is a video response to The Wall Street Journal’s, Where Have All The Good Men Gone? article. This will be a five-part series that was triggered by people wanting to know my thoughts. But I want to make a disclaimer… Disclaimer: As you read what I write in this series, please feel free to comment and disagree. I want to state upfront that my approach to this will leave you with LOTS of “yeah, but what about…” I welcome …
Earthlings, I am honored by all of the Ask Joy submissions that I receive. I’ve been brainstorming different ways to try and tackle more, and trust me–I am VERY excited about some of the possibilities. But until the day where I can sit next to Anderson Cooper and answer your questions via a CNN broadcast, I thought I would throw some of my work at y’all. I would love to hear how YOU would respond to these questions. And make sure you check back if …
Ask Joy My boyfriend of 3+ years just broke up with me because we have different plans. I thought I would be OK, but it feels like my heart is actually breaking. Do I give up my plans to follow him or do I tough it out and just pray that this pain I feel will go away? My Response I wish I could sit down and have a conversation with you. My heart breaks that you are in such pain. I know that pain. …
Ask Joy #1 A guy who has come to my church’s college group only twice has asked me out on a date. Is it ideal for me to go out with him and get to know him, or is it too soon? My Response If he wears a ski mask and/or has a hook for a hand, yes…it’s too soon. There is nothing right or wrong with this situation; however, you may want to ask yourself a few questions and pray for discernment. 1) Do …
Ask Joy I am a 20-year-old woman, in school, working part-time, and dancing every day. I am completely happy with myself, inside and out. The only thing I feel is missing in my life is a relationship. I’ve actually never been in a relationship. I date, but it falls through every time. I keep searching for this “spark” or connection and seem to be having trouble finding it. I know I don’t need a guy to make me happy, but I still want to find …
Ask Joy Will there ever be a point in a relationship where you will feel free of doubt and be 100 percent ready to choose to commit? My Response For some people, yes, but I think that’s more indicative of a personality trait than whether something is right or wrong with the other person. Regardless of personality and feelings, it’s more important to say, “Am I free to date this person based on what Scripture tells me?” Then… Based on your personality, you can decide …
Not gonna lie, weirdest video to date. I blame it on fatigue. It was the last of four Ask Joy’s shot in one shoot. I was tired and when I get tired on camera, I somehow appear to have more energy. You’re welcome. Ask Joy Why is it so hard to let go of feelings for someone you know isn’t good for you? My Response Never heard of the band Mumford & Sons that I so beautifully vocalized? Maybe you live under a rock, or …
Ask Joy What does the Bible say about pre-marital sex? My Response 1. Turn off your computer. 2. Now your iPod. 3. Yup, iPhone too. 4. Turn off the TV. The Miracle Mop infomercial isn’t going anywhere. 5. Stand up. 6. Do 15 jumping jacks. DON’T ASK WHY, JUST DO WHAT I TELL YOU! 7. Walk the 3 feet to your bookshelf or the 3 blocks to the library. 8. You chose the Library? Nice. Now whisper. This is a library for heaven’s sake. 9. …
Ask Joy I have three different friends who are engaged or are getting engaged. Honestly, I am so happy for them. But my issue is that all my friends have pity on me. Why? Not because I am single, but because I have been dating the same guy for five years. The reason we haven’t gotten married is simply a financial issue. Honestly, we don’t want to go into marriage having to borrow money from our parents. The job market has been scarce, and my …
Ask Joy I have this friend. He is my best friend. We write music together, build websites together, and do cooking shows together. We’ve been friends for three years. I’ve started developing strong feelings for him. I don’t know if I should have these feelings. I am really attracted to his heart and to him, but I don’t know if he likes me. I am keeping quiet about it. I want him to start it because he is the man and I think the guy …
Ask Joy Why do nice guys always finish last? I would love to be in a relationship, but I’m known as the “nice guy.” I’m always more like a brother than a boyfriend. Most of my female friends are much more attracted to “bad boys” because there is a sense of danger, which I hear is attractive to women. Do women ever grow out of that feeling, or am I doomed to “always be the groomsman, never the groom”? My Response Thank you …
Ask Joy My name is Dannie and I have recently been listening to your parents’ audio book. I am only 18 and I’ve been with my boyfriend, who is 22, for only a year, but we’ve considered marriage a lot. I know it sounds too young, but it’s just something that’s been on our minds ever since we’ve been together. So here is my question: Within the past year we’ve struggled a lot with communication. The way we argue isn’t the nicest. I have also …
Ask Joy What do you think about long-distance relationships? My Response A relationship is either going to work or it isn’t. I don’t think distance should be the one and only deciding factor, but it is a factor. All relationships, short or long distance, will entail different factors that will contribute to your figuring out whether she or he is who you want to keep getting to know. Don’t overthink it. Just give it a shot if you like the person. Bonus: If things don’t …
Ask Joy As a male truly desiring to date with honor and respect, I have found “Christian women” seem to fall pretty quick even without truly knowing or desiring to know who we are on the inside. Why are they so quick to fall for SOMEone instead of the ONE? (I already know the answer-as I am a guy and understand the lack of godly men who lead well and love well). My Response What I would like to know is why tall men are …
Ask Joy I just got out of a bad relationship and am afraid to date again due to the fact that I’m not a virgin anymore. I’m afraid that the next guy I meet won’t forgive me for my past mistakes. My Response Philippians 3:12-16 Paul reflecting on his life’s purpose even as a sinner: “Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I …
Ask Joy My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three years, and every single day, he and I argue. And we’re not even married yet. It’s now to the point where I don’t feel attracted to him anymore from all the arguing and I want to end the relationship. However, he still wants to work it out and believes we can make it through this. What should we do? My Response I first want to point out a comment that you and many …
In this final video, we tie up the end of Part 4 & Part 5‘s discussion on sexuality and glorifying God (yes those two things go together) and wrap it up by putting Erin and Jenny on the market. Seriously. Also, while Walter and I do have very similar sounding voices, we are not technically related. He is only half German. Hope you enjoyed our discussion! I would love your continued comments on the discussion and stay tuned for next week when I let you …
In this continuation from Part 4, Jenny asks how to glorify God with our sexuality. Erin puts a great perspective on the “struggle” of a chaste life, and I share a bit about my past views…which were anything but glorifying to God. Stay tuned for Part 6…the end of the discussion and where I make Jenny and Erin very uncomfortable in a little thing I like to call, “The Dating Game.” Any men out there single and ready to mingle with these two hotties? Come …
“I don’t have a peace about dating you.” Is that a valid statement or is someone just pulling the “God card.” For those of you who wonder about Christian verbiage, join us as we discuss what it means when people say, “I don’t have a peace about _________.” And for those of you who have no idea what I am referencing when I say “having a peace” or “God card” or “Christian verbiage,” …join us anyways. Erin and Jenny once again bring some thought provoking …
Ask Joy My friend just started to date this guy three weeks ago. In the first two weeks he had cried four times and made her cry twice. Everyone she has talked to, including me, has told her to leave this guy, but she won’t listen. I’m worried about her, so I guess my question is how can I help her make the right choice? My Response This is a tough question. I don’t know why they are both crying so much…malfunctioning tear ducts? My …
Ask Joy Do you think the majority of Christians get married at a young age or rush into it to have sex due to the pressures of the church, the Bible or peers telling you to wait until you’re married? Also, do you think it ties into the high rate of Christians getting a divorce? My Response Personally, I think the trend of Christians getting married at a young age is starting to decrease a bit. The delay in marriage that we see in culture …
Ask Joy What is the appropriate amount to share with a new boyfriend about a serious relationship in the past? My Response My first response and the aspect I truly believe is most important: Pray. Sounds cliché, but I have seen it work in my own life. There were some things I wanted to share with a boyfriend about a past relationship. I didn’t want to rush it, but I also didn’t want to keep it from him. I had prayed for a few weeks …
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