Hey Friends!
Are any of you going through The Illumination Project right now? My hope is that it will create friendships that allow people to share their own stories and illumination moments. In session two, I share the story of how I did not end up getting marred…
Today, I wanted to share a story of someone who did get married. Emily’s story is a clear progression of the different ways we can hear from God, seek and listen to wise counsel and make decisions—even when our feelings are unclear.
Hi Joy,
After dating my boyfriend for a significant amount of time, he says he loves me and can’t imagine his life without me, but can’t find the words to say he wants to marry me.
I feel like this should be a no-brainer. Am I being crazy for wanting him to fish or cut bait, or do I need to respect his needs and timing?
Hi Joy,
I have a dude friend who I really respect and appreciate, but who often complains about how lonely he is and how “all women suck.” It’s really frustrating to hear over and over again, but I’m not sure how to approach him. If I confront him at all he gets defensive.
On one hand, I can understand that he’s coming from a place of hurt and pain. On the other hand, I hate to hear him putting females down and not taking responsibility for his own actions. I really want to be respectful towards him, but every attempt seems to fail! Helpppp!
Hi Joy,
For the first half of my marriage I hadn’t read the Love and Respect book.
Now, the book has completely transformed the way I treat my husband and has made our marriage so much better. He is a great father and very funny— I even feel I have more than I could ask for in some regards.
At the same time, he tends to struggle at meeting my needs emotionally.
To say Sarah Thebarge has had somewhat of an eventful life in her few short decades is an understatement.
From breast cancer to broken engagements, and hiding in closets with refugees, she’s someone who has had to push the pause button quite a few times to say, “Uh, God? What’s going on here?” (My paraphrase.)
Hi friendlings!
About three years ago, I posted my strengths finder personality profile and emphasized that we are constantly growing in different seasons of our lives.
I enjoyed this so much that I couldn’t resist to not post it again…I hope you will join me in analyzing where you are now in this season of your life.
I remember first reading Deborah Tannen’s research in college. It opened my eyes to many of the incredible strengths—and therefore weaknesses—we as human beings have when it comes to communication and understanding each other.
So much of the gender differences she highlighted were things I could see in many of my male peers and in the couples that I would watch (in a creepy way, of course). Read more
Hi Joy,
I’m writing in response to the Ask Joy video you and Stephanie made about transitioning into new seasons of friendships as a newly married person. Well, I’m having the opposite problem.
Hi Joy,
I’ve recently gotten engaged to a man I met online. My fiancé lives and runs his own start-up in San Diego, and when we get married I’ll be moving from my home in Los Angeles to be with him. Read more
Hey Joy,
I just got out of a pretty serious relationship. My boyfriend and I had been dating for a while, even both saying, “I love you”—until one day he came to me and said, “I don’t love you anymore.” I haven’t heard from him since. Read more
Hey Joy,
I’m 22 and have my first girlfriend. She’s pretty amazing—except once a month, she has severe PMS that causes her to go a little cuckoo. I didn’t grow up with sisters or any close girlfriends, so I don’t have any experience handling these swings—it’s the core of our conflicts, and I don’t know what to do anymore. My girlfriend recognizes this issue, and doesn’t want to be this way, but she just has these severe symptoms.
This is going to keep happening every single month. What can I do? Is there hope?
My best friend currently lives in another state. We’re both married, and though we’ve visited and have done stuff as couples, my best friend wants me to come visit for some “girl time.” When I asked my husband if I could go, he flipped out and shut down, saying, “You want to go without me? Fine. Go right now.”
Hey friendlings!
Today I’m comin’ at you from the sunny suburbs because finally, finally, I got visitation rights to see Walter, my long-lost dog love. Unfortunately, he won’t stop hiding under the table.
I think that means he missed me. Read more
Happy Valentine’s Day, Everyone!
In case you missed it yesterday, my friend, Justin, and I shared a (slightly cloudy) memory of my first date. Let’s just say it didn’t exactly go as planned.
So today on the “holiday of love,” may all your dates be filled with free ice cream, gold charms, and Oscar-worthy films that don’t result in door slamming! (And a whole lot more Love and Respect than 16 year-olds know how to give.)
My sister-in-law recently told me that there are three sides to every story:
1. Theirs.
2. Ours.
3. What actually happened.
Hey Joy,
Two questions:
1. When you want to laugh and have fun, who comes to mind first?
2. What are your thoughts on interracial relationships? Read more
One of the side effects to the delay or absence of marriage in our culture is that many of us have had strong connections with people who we didn’t end up with forever. (This is by no means a bad thing if we choose to treat the people we date well.)
Esther is a humanitarian photographer. What does that mean? Well in my words, it means she puts people above getting the best shot. With every client, Esther will build a relationship, validate a person’s significance, and hear their story before she works on the best lighting or angle.
Hi Joy,
I have a question about the delineation between dependence and assistance. For me, I have always done better when I have a romantic relationship to motivate (inspire?) me to do better.
This one goes out to all my ladies!
(Guys, it’s okay. You can stay or skip down to the bottom for the chance to win a rad read.)
I want to talk to you about my friend, Jennie Allen. She’s a writer, speaker, teacher, and most importantly, a dreamer. And lately, her dreams have been coming true. Read more
Things that matter and make a difference rarely happen overnight.
Whether it’s our dream to start a movement or our desire to fix a character flaw, it takes plotting, planning, prayer, sweat, sometimes tears…and then you actually have to DO.
How many of you made a New Year’s resolution?
How many of you have already broken those resolutions?
If you’ve been perusing the site at all lately, you’ll know that I’ve got some fun things going on. Between the launch of The Illumination Project, my upcoming book (aptly named Permanent Vertigo), a few upcoming events, and the general Love and Respect Now & Love and Respect ministries, I’m having a blast. (Heart palpitations.)
But I think I could clear a few things up…
Joy,
I’ve got a bit of a situation—I’ve gone out on several dates with someone, but I’m essentially just not attracted to them for a few reasons. How do I tell them nicely? Especially when they are so into me? Do people want to hear the truth? I am not sure I know how to let this person down gracefully AND to the point that they understand it is a no-go.
—Beth
Welcome to 2014!
14 is my favorite number so I’m thinking there’s gonna be a lot of…I don’t know what, but I’m just happy about 14 representing.
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